My Reality

Quote by Maureen Hawkins

2008-04-07T19:36:00.002-05:00

I saw this on another blog today and had to jot it down for posterity...

Before you were conceived I wanted you;
Before you were born I loved you;
Before you were here an hour I would die for you;
This is the miracle of life.

~ Maureen Hawkins

I love this. Makes me want to add to it and say, "Even after 20 years and beyond, I still feel the same way...

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Passing the Torch

2008-03-07T16:36:00.008-05:00

Here are some photos from yesterday when Andy served as a guest speaker in Samantha's Latin class:

I was so impressed. He was articulate, comfortable, interesting, and boy, does he know his stuff. He gave them a detailed history of the background of Homer's Iliad and then told how it relates to Virgil's Aeneid and the history of Rome.

I'd like to say I can take credit for that - that I taught it all to him in our homeschooling... but alas, I did not. I threw the Iliad at him (like a hot potato) when he was about 15, and he devoured it. The secret truth is that I have never read it. After he loved it so much, he begged me to read it - and I tried. Honest.

This year, I threw the Iliad at Sam and she liked it alright. She also read the Odyssey (no, I haven't read that one either, but I've seen the Armand Assante version on TV).

Anyway, I am so proud. I loved that Andy knew what he was doing - and did it so well - and that Sam soaked it all in and loves it, too.

Afterward, we went to McDonald's, and perhaps just to prove to me how little I really know, Andy decided to show me a few words in ancient Greek, which he wrote on a napkin:

I don't know what it says, but I'm sure it must be something about what a great and brilliant mom he has. ;)

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Teenaged Opinions

2008-02-10T15:28:00.000-05:00

Recently, Molly (age 14) told me that one of her friends thinks Johnny Depp is hot.

"Eww," she told me, "How could she like him? He's old!"

I told her Patrick Dempsey (who is from Maine, I might add, and who is equally as hot as Johnny Depp - not that *I* would care) is about the same age as Johnny Depp.

"Eww. He's an old man, too," was her response.

So I said, "Well, just because a guy is as old as your dad, doesn't mean he's not hot."

She looked at me, blankly. So I drove in for the kill.

"Your dad's hotter than both those guys," I told her.

Her response?

"Double Eww."

Ah, the vocabulary of a teenager.

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Kitty Hospital

2008-02-08T22:26:00.000-05:00

Here's what we have to do every other day... until further notice.

I'm just glad Samantha isn't faint-hearted about such things. She would make a great vet. Animals love her and she really knows how to calm them. The rest of the family isn't much help at times such as this - Todd is afraid of needles, Molly can't stand the idea on so many levels, and Andy isn't here. It takes two of us because the kitty likes to move.

Thankfully, this is making him feel so much better. :)

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Our Kitty

2008-02-07T20:59:00.000-05:00

I opted not to blog about our dog dying back at Christmas. It was hard - much harder than I'd have imagined - and I just didn't want to share it here. One of these days I'm going to put the story up, with some pics, but today isn't that day.

Today, it's kitty news. Our cat Ricky (we have Ricky and Lucy) was diagnosed with kidney disease last week. He is 12 years old. We were told he might not live out the week, and this coming just 5 weeks after losing our dog, we were devastated, to say the least.

And yes, we are very "into" our pets. It doesn't just 'feel' like they're part of the family. They ARE family.

So the vet told us we could give our kitty fluid treatments (read that, home I.V.s) and change his diet. She didn't promise it would help, but we decided to try it.

Now, a week later, Ricky is back from the dead. He is back to his old tricks, but he is also smiling again (as much as a cat can smile). Once again he's purring, talking to us, and running to me when I call him. He is very indignant about the needle going into his back every other day, but he likes his new food and doesn't complain much.

We know his days are numbered, but as of now, we've been given a reprieve.

And we are so thankful.

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Football

2008-01-20T19:32:00.000-05:00

My mom phoned today while I was watching the Patriots beat San Diego. And yes, let me just clarify here that I am still a Denver Bronco fan, first and foremost, but living in New England all these years has given me an honest to goodness love for the Patriots and the Red Sox - even before the Red Sox curse was broken and the Patriots became the best team in NFL history.

My mantra is that I'll root for the Patriots as long as they aren't playing the Broncos. This year the Broncos had a lousy season, but that's a whole 'nuther story.

Back to the phone call ~ my mom commented that it's sweet that I'll watch football with my husband. I quickly informed her that my husband had to work this afternoon and since I couldn't persuade my daughters to watch it with me, I was cheering all alone. Even my son doesn't enjoy football.

Where did I go wrong?

Besides, doesn't my mom remember my despair in 1977 when, at the age of 10, I watched my very first Superbowl? I was distraught for days when the Dallas Cowboys beat my beloved Broncos, 27 - 10. From then on, I was hooked. Doesn't she remember my school girl crushes? Joe Montana, Troy Aikman, and of course John Elway.

As we've moved around the country, I've found a place in my heart for some of the other teams from the towns in which we've lived: the Washington Redskins and the San Diego Chargers, in particular. It took me a bit longer to enjoy college ball, but now I find out can lounge on the couch for hours if any game is on the TV.

I find that I am quite alone in my true-blue love for football - as a woman, that is. Most of my friends don't like it, don't understand it, and have no desire to learn it. A few will suffer through games, sitting patiently while their husbands cheer. One or two really seem to like it, but I never hear about them really watching the game, unless they're with their main guy.

Anyway, I'm psyched that the Patriots beat the Chargers this afternoon, and now I'm rooting for the Packers to beat the lame NY Giants. Sorry, sports fans, but the Manning brothers are just too pretentious and whiny to suit me.

Ok, gotta go, commercial's over.

And sorry Mom, you'll just never understand.

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

A Homeschool Family

2008-01-12T22:26:00.000-05:00

This cracked me up today. Just had to share!

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Happy New Year ~ !

2008-01-01T00:27:00.000-05:00

Making lots of changes and re-thinking priorities on this early New Year's Day. Always a good time to re-group and start a fresh.

Blessings to you all for a healthy, happy New Year!

Copyright © 2008 - Paulla Estes

Merry Christmas...

2007-12-25T17:03:00.001-05:00

So much to share here, but today isn't the day.

Blessings to you all...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Grammar in Real Life

2007-11-27T18:31:00.001-05:00

So who, as a child, wasn't corrected when saying, "Can me and Jenny go to the corner store?"

If the adult who answered the question was worth his or her salt, he quickly corrected you by saying, "Jenny and I..." to which you replied, "Can Jenny and I go to the corner store?"

My two youngest daughters are nearly 14 and 15 years old. They get this sentence right about half the time, in spite of many years of grammar training and correction, by me, a one-time English major.

But the big victory this year has been NOT ending a sentence with a preposition. Not only do they use this part of grammar properly, they correct one another, and even their friends (kindly, and tongue in cheek, but correcting just the same.)

In this vein, I just came across a wonderful Churchill quote that I had to share:

"From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put. "

Classic Churchill. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Make-over

2007-11-26T20:09:00.000-05:00

This must be what being sick and being stuck at home does to me. I've decided to do a bit of redecorating here on the blog, and not only that, I've changed my name. Homeschool Ponderings just wasn't doing it for me. I felt like it was a label I kept trying to fit into, and when what I wrote didn't fit, I started to hate the name.

This new name allows more freedom. It will still be about homeschooling, since that's such a big part of our lives, but rather than trying to fit round, square, and multi-sided pegs into one triangular hole, I've just made one huge hole for them all to fit into nicely ~ My Reality.

If that doesn't open up possibilities, I don't know what will. :)

Oh, and P.S. ~ I also did some redecorating over at my Maine Blog, so pop on over for a visit if you have time.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Pay Now or Pay Later?

2007-11-25T17:31:00.001-05:00

At this time of the year, just after Thanksgiving, I always wonder if we ought to just go ahead and start our Christmas break early - like RIGHT NOW.

We did that a few years ago. I was very organized and after having started school in mid-August, we had more than a month off at Christmas, which included Thanksgiving. This was great in a lot of ways - it helped with the Christmas shopping and baking, and of course we all enjoyed the extra time off. But I also found that it was that much harded to get back on task in January.

This year, I'm tempted to do it again. I've been sick for a week and 1/2 and I just NOW started antibiotics, so it will be awhile before I'm fully recovered. Add to that, I have to fly out west over next weekend (if I'm better, of course). And this comes just weeks before Christmas, and I haven't so much as begun any semblance of Christmas shopping or even planning.

Yet, we didn't start in mid-August, and none of us ever wants to continue school after the end of May. Either we pay now or we pay later.

Besides, will they remember how to do Algebra in January if we stop now?

Probably not, but oh, the temptation!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

In Honor of Thanksgiving...

2007-11-22T16:35:00.000-05:00

I think I'm going to do this...

I just found this site and I had to share it.

Complaint Free Bracelet

What a great idea. Even if I don't get THE actual bracelet that they offer, I rarely wear bracelets, so I'm just going to put one on that I already have - and use THAT as the reminder.

I'll check back in from time to time for updates on how it's working. I need all the help I can get. If only we all could change our habits from complaining to thanksgiving ALL year long...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

A Neat Site

2007-11-10T22:21:00.000-05:00

Check THIS out...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Letting Emotions Get the Best of Me

2007-11-10T18:44:00.000-05:00

I had one of those moments today.

In recent years (maybe I can attribute it to turning 40) my emotions have really leveled out and rarely can things get to me like they used to 10, 15 and 20 years ago.

But today, I became (on the inside, anyway) one of those parents we all hate to see - the kind that gets WAY too emotionally involved with their kids' sports team.

Molly's last AAU basketball game was today. Her team was seated third in the tournament and the team they were to play first was definitely beatable. After a really good season with a few wins and a few losses, we really thought they could beat this team. And they could have. However...

The regular coach couldn't be there today because he was visiting his daughter who is playing basketball in college (we told him his priorities were out of whack, but he went anyway - can you imagine?) ;)

Consequently, one of the dads stepped in to coach the team - a very outspoken dad, I might add, who often comes to practices and interrupts the regular coach with lots of helpful advice for the team. Are you hearing my tone?

I also might add that this particular dad's daughter is the one player on the team who really doesn't seem to belong there. She won't do what the coach tells her, she can't keep up with the rest of the team, and she often gets in the way of her own players. It's sad, really, but it's a competitive league, and it is what it is.

Today, our team was ahead at the half and we were gaining momentum. After the half, one of our girls got hurt, and then another. Although we still had plenty of players, the coach/dad decided to keep his daughter in for the remainder of the game. It was utterly ludicrous. Even by-standers and parents from the other team were asking why this girl, who obviously couldn't play, was still on the court each time subs were called in or out. All the parents were so angry and we all wanted to say something, but we've had such a good season with such great relationships all around, that we chickened out.

Though I had plenty of evil thoughts of my own, I had plenty of help, listening to all the disgruntled parents around me. I was furious with this coach who seemed to be systematically destroying our shot at the tournament.

It was no surprise that we lost by 12 points. I wanted to go up and give the smiling coach (ugh) a piece of my mind, but I held it in. The rest of the girls on the team were also visibly upset and the parents were fueling their fire.

In the car on the way home, Molly and I vented to each other about the whole thing and said things we shouldn't have said, thought things we shouldn't have thought. But we did get it out of our systems.

In the end, it WAS just a game and it wasn't THAT big of a deal. People make mistakes and things happen. In the big picture, it just doesn't matter.

But... I was surprised at how quickly my emotions got away from me and I totally lost sight of that.

I guess I'm not so grown up after all.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Baby Love

2007-11-09T09:49:00.001-05:00

Last night I met a friend at McDonald's for a 45-minute catch-up. This may sound silly, but we are both busy, running in different directions (from one another) and she has nine children. Need I say more?

Anyway, while her young ones were at Awana, we met at McD's and she brought her youngest, one-year-old Joshua. He is the perfect little baby - one that I can't help calling "pumpkin" each time I see him. He has big blue eyes, pudgy cheeks, a winning smile, and he is SO quiet! He hardly says a thing, he just sits there acting sweet, being good, and looking happy. Is that a perfect baby or what?

So when we met in the parking lot, my friend was getting out of her van and she handed Joshua down to me. Since we don't see one another often, he really doesn't know who I am, and his mom said he might get upset as he's beginning to go through the separation anxiety stage. But lo and behold, when I took him, he gave me a huge smile and just stared into my eyes. Oh the love!

I carried him into McDonalds and he just kept looking at me, smiling. I'm sure I made a complete fool of myself, cooing at him, smiling at him, saying idiotic things and calling him "pumpkin." I didn't care - this was too good to be true. Finally I pressed my cheek against his downy hair and he leaned his little head against me in a hug. I nearly cried. I told my friend, "Oh my gosh, he loves me!" She just laughed and shrugged. She was probably starting to think she might better get her baby back before I took off with him or something.

Ultimately, I did give him back - she made me do it when I started offering him fries, ice cream, a cheeseburger - anything for another precious baby hug.

There really is no feeling like that, you know? :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

1,440 Minutes

2007-11-09T08:20:00.000-05:00

This morning I picked up an older devotional book I read from time to time. I still have the concept of hurrying/time, etc. on my mind, and I was looking for ideas on how to be quiet and savor the moment.

The story I read was, ironically, about how there are 1,440 minutes in every day. They are ours to use as we choose, but once they are gone, we won't get them back.

Yesterday I spent a long time with my daughter, scrolling through two hilarious websites about pets. She has a nasty cold and was wrapped in a blanket, drinking hot tea. She was sleep deprived and stuffy and needed a pick-me-up. When I came upon these sites, I called her over and we laughed together, sometimes unable to breathe, for well over an hour.

Was this a good use of my time or a time waster? I'm sure there are differing opinions on this, but I see it as a good use of the time. Sure, I could have been cleaning out the basement, doing the dishes, folding the laundry, or one of the other millions of un-done tasks in our home, but this was a precious, fun time. My daughter forgot her cold momentarily and we shared some healthy laughter - good for what ails anyone! We're still chuckling about it this morning.

How will you spend your 1,440 minutes today?

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Hurrying...

2007-11-08T14:58:00.000-05:00

It seems that the more I rush, the behinder and the behinder I get...

If you've ever seen the movie, Click with Adam Sandler, you'll understand this post. While there are very few things I would ever want to fast-forward in my life (dental appointments rank up there, I admit), I often feel like there is some sadistic beast who DOES have hold of the remote control and pushes fast-forward at each and every whim.

It seems as though we rush to get up, get going, do school work and haphazardly clean the house and prepare the meals. Then we rush to go to classes, volunteer commitments, sports practices and games, and church functions. Then we rush to enjoy all our entertainment so we can rush to bed in order to get a rushed-night's sleep.

No wonder we feel out-of-breath and discontent. Rarely do we sit and listen to the quiet, enjoy a still moment, or just "be." There's too much to do for that. It makes me think of a Henry Blackaby quote I heard years ago that went something like this...

Rather than telling us, "don't just sit there, do something," perhaps God is telling us, "don't just do things, sit there..."

I regularly read this blog and I am always blessed by it. Earlier this week, a dear friend sent me to an earlier post entitled, Why the Push? This really got me thinking and I especially appreciated the quote by Mark Buchanan, who said, "Through all that haste, I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away."

Wow. Is that profound or what?

Last night, I hurried home from activities with the kids, hurried into the kitchen to make dinner, and sat down at the table to chop up some broccoli for the pasta. After a few swift, deliberate chops, I stopped and remembered the above quote. I wondered how I could turn this moment into one of peace and quietness rather than just one more session of hurrying.

I took a deep breath, put on some soft music, and purposed to savor the moment, menial and repetitive as it may be. Rather than just getting through it, I thanked God for the fresh produce and enjoyed the sound of the quiet around me. I'm sure it slowed my pulse and untied the knots that in my stomach that I didn't even know were there.

This may seem minor, but in this busy life, my new goal is to stop and savor all the moments I can. I don't want to throw away the time; I want to enjoy every minute...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Daylight Savings Time Mix Up

2007-10-29T14:15:00.000-05:00

When I was in the 9th grade, we all got a big surprise one Easter morning. We hunted our plastic eggs, ate our chocolate bunnies, and headed off to church. When we arrived, it turned out that we were an hour late. It was the day that Daylight Savings Time was beginning, and somehow, we had missed all the warnings. It was funny, and over the years I've seen it happen to many others, all of whom have had that same bewildered look we must've had.

Well, last week I noticed on my kitchen calendar that Daylight Savings Time was supposed to end YESTERDAY, October 28. The calendar in my bedroom said the same thing. So I set the clocks back early Saturday evening. We stayed up late to watch Game Three of the World Series and didn't worry so much about it, since we'd have an extra hour to sleep the next morning.

On Sunday, we all got up with the sun shining through our windows for the first time in a while, and got ready for church. Just before we were to leave, my hubby got on line and discovered that it was NOT the day to set the clocks back, and that in fact, we still had another week of Daylight Savings Time.

Oh the horror!

How is it that at least two of the calendars in our home did this to us?

Well, we were already an hour late for church (deja vu totally got me that morning) so we went out to breakfast instead, and then came back home to watch a Ravi Zacharias DVD we'd ordered recently. We had a great discussion, and then after that, we carved pumpkins all afternoon.

Next week, we get to do it all over again - the DLS part, not the rest. :P

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Where has the time gone?

2007-10-29T13:43:00.001-05:00

Well, I'm not going to try to completely re-cap the last almost two months, but suffice it to say, it's been busy around here. Having Andy gone, even if he is only 45 minutes away, has definitely changed the dynamics of our home.

We began school on schedule, just after Labor Day, and Samantha started going to a local private school where she takes Latin two days each week. It's been a huge adjustment for her, going out of the house for school for the first time, but it's also been an amazing blessing. She absolutely loves her teacher and is learning so much. She has a love/hate relationship with the uniform she has to wear, but she's dealing with it. So far, she has an *A* in the class and she loves Latin more than she ever thought she could...

Soccer came and is almost gone. Once again my dear hubby volunteered to coach the girls' team. It's a fun league because it's made up mostly of kids who don't want the stress and competition of the school soccer team, so they join this rec. league. There are no try-outs, just sign-ups. There is only one practice per week and the games are on Saturday mornings. It's always a great way for our family - and the entire community - to start our autumn weekends.

My mom and aunt paid us a visit earlier this month and we did a bunch of sightseeing and eating. Way too much eating. Here are Granny and Auntie Scrappy all bundled up to watch one of our chilly-morning soccer games...

And of course the leaves have been characteristically beautiful around here for well over a month - an unusually long time for them to last. We never get tired of the amazing color of the maples...

And here are a couple of pictures at a local lake where we stopped recently when our trip to the corn maze didn't quite work out. (You don't want to know).

And last, but certainly not least, the Red Sox won the World Series and there is talk of little else around here today. :)

Have a good day, friends!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Off to College

2007-09-02T23:03:00.000-05:00

We took Andy to his dorm today. Although it's his second year of college, this is his first year in the dorm and away from home. It was a wonderful day all the way around. Here are a few memories of the day...

Here's his room when we first got to it - not as small as we thought, and much brighter - but still bleak w/o his personal touch ~

Some family pics in the room ~

The desk ~

Getting stuff unpacked and put away ~

More views of the room and hallway ~

The outside of the dorm - which we all agree is in serious need of remodeling!

Andy and Sherilyn walking away to the first day orientation ~

And I must say, in spite of his excitement and nonexistent concern about meeting people, etc., it was much easier for this mom to see her first born walk away to this new chapter of his life with a buddy at his side... much like he was 5-years-old and walking away to kindergarten once again...

*Sniff*

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Options/Decisions

2007-08-27T12:55:00.000-05:00

School starts one week from tomorrow, for us as a homeschool, and for most of the schools in the area, other than the local college, which starts this week.

Samantha, my 14yo, wants to take more Latin this year. More Latin means WAY more Latin than I can give her... I, who never took Latin, but who have been making a pathetic attempt toward learning it with her over the past couple of years. A VERY pathetic attempt. She just blows past me and ends up teaching me... and I don't even really want to learn it.

So there we are.

There is a local Christian school which offers Latin, but it is expensive and 20 minutes away. This is an option, but it IS expensive. She'll need a uniform for that school, too. Also expensive. There is also the local college which is a really high-end liberal arts college. They offer Latin, and they would allow Sam to audit their Latin 101 class; but the professor assured me that they run at a very fast pace and that she would have to keep up. At 14, I'm just not sure she's ready for that - not the pace, but the unbending expectations.

We also have a couple of curriculums we could use here at home and I could bite the bullet and really continue learning Latin with Sam this year. This is the option she likes best, being the quiet introvert that she is, and it is the option I like least.

Sigh. I hate it when my kids like homeschooling better than I do. :P

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Needing to Plan, Starting to Plan... Sort of

2007-08-24T12:52:00.000-05:00

Every year in the past, I’ve always started looking toward the NEXT school year in March or April. By then I’m starting to feel a bit burnt out with school and I think I start planning the next year just for something NEW to do. Last year I had the whole next year planned before school got out in June.

This year, however…

I didn’t even THINK about planning until about two weeks ago. I didn’t START planning until about five days ago. I’m just now starting to look forward to this next year and get excited about it (a little). But I’m also being realistic, perhaps for the very first time. I’m actually planning subjects that I KNOW we won’t finish and others that I KNOW we’ll completely ignore after about January. And I’m really ok with that.

Last year was so hard for so many reasons, the main one being Sam’s health. I’m feeling a good bit of trepidation about this year because of that. It’s been a good, relaxing and successful summer… and I don’t want it to end… not just the weather, but the feeling good – for Sam, especially.

I do worry that by the end of this year, I just may not do anything at all – the planning may never happen and the kids just may not get schooled next year.

Which reminds me, I need to write a post about how well Sam is doing and WHY - at least MY beliefs as to why.

Yeah, I'd rather do that than go back to my school planning...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

One more thing...

2007-08-22T08:14:00.000-05:00

Doesn't our little niece look like a Mini-Me of Cameron Diaz? :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Catching up...

2007-08-22T07:56:00.000-05:00

Recently, my hubby celebrated his 43rd birthday. In honor of his special day, we bought him a fire pit he'd had his eye on, and we enjoyed a cookout on our patio, complete with steaks, cool weather, and an amazing LACK of mosquitoes.

The Cookout

The Campfire

My seriousness about the making of S'Mores!

Later that same week, we went to the beach yet again. I enjoyed the sunshine on the beach, and when I dared to dip my toes into the frigid water, it hurt. I mean, it hurt a LOT. I jumped back in protest. The kids, however, braved the cold and shivered as they rode the waves on their boogie board...

Andy and Sherilyn have been painting our house. We couldn't figure how how they would be able to reach the eve above the garage, as it is very high and the garage is too steep to stand on, as well as too steep for a ladder-holder. Our neighbor helped us to come up with this contraption...

It actually worked, but I had a hard time watching.

As summer draws to a close, I realize I have GOT to start planning our school year. After all, we start in less than two weeks. I've been spending time ordering, browsing catalogs, and making plans with the materials we already have. I love the planning part of homeschooling, even if I do make a mess...

If only CARRYING OUT all those grandiose plans were as fun! :)

Sibling Dynamics

2007-08-07T21:16:00.000-05:00

This week Molly (age 13) is away at camp. Samantha (age 14) was supposed to go, but she opted out this year. While Molly loves to be surrounded by people, noise, and organized chaos, Samantha does not. Sam loves a quiet book, being alone, and order. I'm surprised she actually went back to camp for the second time last year - and even liked it.

It's funny, though, how different life is when one sibling is gone for a period of time. I've been so busy looking forward (in a chronological sense, of course) to Andy moving into the dorms next month, that I'd forgotten what it might be like if one of the girls was to leave instead. Molly and Andy are the extroverts in the family. Sam is the consummate introvert, and Todd and I are somewhere in the middle, with both of us leaning toward the introverted side of the scale.

As Andy has grown up and begun to find a life of his own, he's been gone a lot during the day and in the evenings. The house is often much quieter, as a result. But of course, Molly seems to fill that vacuum quite adeptly. Now that she's gone this week, I find myself in utter bliss. Ok, not really - I miss her terribly. But the reality is that the house is delightfully quiet, and moreover, when Molly is gone, Sam comes farther out of her shell and in her own quiet way, tries her luck at filling the noiseless vacuum.

Bottom line, in my own round-about, disjointed way, I'm observing that each family member brings something to the table that helps to define what the family is, as a whole. With even just one person gone, we are only a fraction of what we are as a whole. With Molly gone this week, something is definitely amiss; and while we are enjoying the quiet, it doesn't seem normal. When Andy leaves in the fall, the four of us who are left will attempt to be a family of four in his absense, but it just won't be the same.

I've been joking for over a year now that with all my kids having reached their teens, I'm on the home stretch. But I'm not sure I want to be.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Recent Pics of Our Summer

2007-07-28T20:48:00.000-05:00

Life has been so busy this summer that I've had very little computer time, and what I do have ends up just being work.

Here are a few photos of what we've been doing the past couple of weeks...

This is me working in our church nursery with one of my favorite little munchkins.

Todd's new/old truck.

Here's Molly at a basketball camp.

We were paid a visit by Todd's aunt and uncle from Louisiana.

Our doggy taking a dreaded trip to the vet for a check-up.

Sam at horse camp.

An adorably naughty chipmunk who got into our bird feeder even when the squirrels were too afraid, due to its promixity to the house.

Andy turned 20 earlier in the week.

One of these days I'm going to start looking toward the upcoming school year and begin to order books, etc.

But I'm just not ready yet.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

More Yard Work... and random thoughts...

2007-07-14T08:23:00.000-05:00

This is the year for yard changes at our house. On a whim (sort of) I decided to rip out most of the bushes in the front of our house. I left a couple of rhododendrons, but gave them massive hair-cuts and ripped out most of the rest. PLUS, I ripped out enough vinca to cover the state of Montana - and we live in Maine, so you figure that one out. It was all wrapped around the bushes, and it’s huge, evil roots were choking out the roots of the bushes. I hate vinca – it is pretty, but EVIL. EVIL. My back is now suffering greatly – thank God for ibuprofen.

But now it’s all gone (the vinca, not the backache). Well, I’m sure there is a remnant, but when it rears its ugly head, I’ll pounce and rip it out too.

Now there is just dirt and a few skinny bushes in our front garden. I’ll put up pics later. I’m going to put in a couple of hydrangeas and maybe a few flowering perennials – and lots of mulch. No more ground cover. Did I mention I HATE vinca? LOL.

Yesterday was Molly’s half-day (13 and ½ years old) – we celebrate those (sort of) since the girls’ birthdays are so close to Christmas.

We have relatives coming in sometime today or tomorrow - yeah, it's THAT specific. So we’re trying to row with the flow.

By the way, I was just informed yesterday by my brilliant husband that it’s “Row with the flow” rather than “Roll with the flow.” I thought it meant to just hang on as the flow rolls you - - wherever - - but Todd says that you’re supposed to row, and just do it in the way that you’re going. Are we pathetic or what? All my confusion is probably thanks to growing up with parents with VERY southern accents who also just said things wrong sometimes. Oh, and just a few years ago I learned that the saying, “Tough row to hoe” is not “Tough road to hoe.” (What is it with me and the word, ROW?) I always thought it WOULD be very tough to hoe a road, so that worked for me, LOL.

The big news at our house this week - we bought a pick-up truck. Todd’s been wanting one for YEARS And YEARS. It’s an older GMC Sierra – he bought it from a friend at work. It’s dark blue and has a rack on the back with big search lights. It has giant mud tires, 4-wheel drive, and looks very macho. We love it! How does the country song go - - there's somethin' women like about a pick-up man. Yep, that's me. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Parade Pics

2007-07-02T20:36:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to share some pics from our day at a local 4th of July Parade yesterday. We're still trying to figure out why the parade was held (for the first time) on the FIRST rather than the FOURTH, but oh well. We went anyway.

Here's Molly (with her favorite drink and her dad)...

Here's Samantha with powdered sugar in her hair (from the much-loved fried dough that really is the only reason we go to these things in the first place)...

And lastly, Andy and Sherilyn. Aren't they cute? :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Random Pics

2007-07-01T05:09:00.000-05:00

First, I have successfully attained my goal of learning how to make bread (the old fashioned way, without a bread-maker) in honor of turning 40. I can actually make TWO types of bread now, which are edible and delicious. Here's proof ~

Second, our old jeep died recently and I had to share this photo of my husband's brilliant ingenuity. That's what I call a "dedicated fisherman!"

We actually found one of our cats in this position on the sofa. Sure, someone had left the open phone book there, but he decided to sit down and read it all on his own...

Lastly, what has become a very frequent treat in our home. My son Andy, and his girlfriend, both work at a local nursery. Often when she comes to visit us, she brings leftover flowers from the nursery that would have been thrown away. These gifts never cease to brighten our home and my spirits!

Have a great Sunday ~ :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

You have your Daddy's feet

2007-06-24T20:42:00.000-05:00

That's not the phrase a teenaged girl wants to hear - but recently we all marveled at what we had failed to notice before... that 13yo Molly's feet are exactly like her dad's.

We took a bunch of photos to prove it. If feet gross you out, stop reading now and don't scroll down...

"At least," Molly pointed out, "My feet have more of a tan than Dad's."
That's the understatement of the year. His feet haven't seen the light of day... ever.

Oh, and her feet are smaller - but only slightly. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Babies!

2007-06-23T06:40:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, I took the girls on a surprise visit to a friend's house out in the country (more country than where we live). They didn't really want to go - it was early and they wanted to stay in their summer jammies and play computer games all day. But we all were in for a treat when we found out the friend's cat had 3-week-old kittens.

I couldn't have gotten the smiles off my girls' faces if I'd wanted to. :)

So cute!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Summer Studies in Baking

2007-06-19T20:33:00.000-05:00

Last week I found a great recipe for Tea Towel Biscuits. Along with my desire to make great homemade bread (the old fashioned way), I've been wanting to learn how to make biscuits in a way other than popping open the Pillsbury can and rolling them out onto the pan.

So at 9:30 in the evening, when everyone was getting ready for bed, Samantha and I decided to try the recipe. We figured it would be fun to do together, and if it worked, we'd have a tasty snack with leftovers for breakfast the next day. If it didn't work, we could feed it to the squirrels.

We followed the detailed directions (which I most definitely need) to the letter, and Voila ~ Samantha and I are now bona fide biscuit bakers!

Here are the only ingredients:

Here are the biscuits just before baking:

And here is the finished product ~ complete with a cutesy plate I made back in the 2nd grade. :)

I highly recommend this EASY recipe (emphasis on the EASY).

Enjoy!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Did I Mention...?

2007-06-19T20:22:00.000-05:00

The birthday gift from my husband that arrived late?

I think he was/is a little too pumped up by my declaration that in honor of turning 40, I am going to learn how to make bread - the old fashioned way.

I've been playing with recipes, trying things out, and I'm actually having quite a bit of success. But this? Wow - the pressure!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Good-byes Hurt

2007-06-18T18:45:00.000-05:00

When I started homeschooling my children more than eleven years ago, my goal wasn't to protect them from the outside world, as many homeschoolers seek to do. I was simply responding to the fact that we were in a lousy school district with a lousy classroom teacher, and I never really thought we'd homeschool for more than a year or two.

As the years went by, I realized my kids were being protected from various aspects of pain and frustration in the "outside world," simply because I kept them home. They have had very little experience with peer pressure. While they've had (and do have) peer groups through sports, clubs, and other activities, their main peer group has been our little family of five. Consequently, the "pressure" had been through us - and that's been a good thing we didn't foresee.

So when pain hits our family in the form of school- or peer-related issues, while it's sad and hard for us, it's also surprising. Maybe it shouldn't be. Maybe it's just "real life" we're experiencing. Maybe I'm too close to the situation to even be able to comment on it coherently.

Here's what's happened recently. I wrote a post on my Maine Blog last week about our good friends who are moving to Texas. These are friends we met through Molly's (our 13-year-old) extensive involvement in basketball at the local public school. She became very close with one of her teammates, and I with the mom. We began spending time together as a family - at lunch between games, on the sidelines during games and practice, and on shared car rides to and from tournaments. Soon, we were going out for lunch and having dinners together, completely separate from basketball.

This has all happened just in the last six months. We knew this family was moving, but I think it's safe to say that we were in denial.

Last night, a wonderful family in town threw a going-away party for these departing friends. It was a fun time with lots of people, food, a swimming pool, and tons of laughter. But it was also gut-wrenching. As soon as the first guests began to leave, the tears began. And as my soon-to-leave friend pointed out, watching people cry is like watching people puke - it's contagious. Before long, most of the crowd was in tears off and on. By the end of the evening, everyone was sobbing openly. I have never seen that much crying in one place - even at the many funerals I've attended. It was positively awful - but also positively wonderful. It showed me, my friend, her family, and all the people in attendance that we all share a special love for this special family... and it was reciprocated.

Last night, after the last goodbyes had been said and we got home to dry the first batch of our tears, Molly and I stayed up talking long into the wee hours of the morning. I'm not sure what hurt me more - to lose my friend to a faraway move, to watch her family grieve their own losses, or to watch my youngest child lose one of her best friends. It broke my heart.

This morning, many of us squashed the urge to phone them, text them, or otherwise hang on to their departing car and beg them to stay one more day, one more week, or even forever. Sure, Texas isn't the other side of the world, and in our mobile society, we can visit, as can they. Thanks to email and low cost long distance phoning, we can keep in touch as much if not more than we did when they lived here in town.

But we know the reality. Life will go on for us. A new life awaits them. We will go on with all our other friends. They will make new ones. Our lives have now diverged on two very different paths. Regardless of our love for our friends and their love for us, those paths will continue to move in different directions. Maybe that's what hurts the most. We will all continue making new memories, but so few of them will be shared.

Today, we decided to start our new life without them by going to the beach. I took my daughter and a few of her friends, and as we listened to music during the car ride there, we all found ourselves in tears once again. But we did go on. And our friends are well out of Maine by now and on their way to their new home.

Making and losing friends is one thing from which homeschooling hasn't protected us. But good grief - would we want it to? As C.S. Lewis once said, "The pain I feel now is the happiness I had before. That's the deal."

And that's one of those things that is an education all by itself.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

My Favorite Guy

2007-06-17T16:42:00.000-05:00

Earlier I mentioned two of my three favorite guys. Here is the obvious third - the top favorite! I love this photo. I took it recently at Home Depot when he was goofing around and didn't know I'd brought my camera with me. :)

We've had our share of rough times over the years, and I'd be stupid to think there aren't any more in our future. But after all this time, just one look at him can still make my heart skip a beat. He's a great dad to our kids and he takes such good care of us.

I'm so glad we have a day set aside to honor dads. So often in our modern world, especially on popular TV shows, dads are shown to be bumbling idiots that don't deserve the respect of the mom and kids. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Happy Father's Day to my Sweetie. ;)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Father's Day

2007-06-17T07:15:00.000-05:00

This is a photo of my dad and my son, Andy - two of the three most important men in my life. They went to Europe together last summer and this is one of my favorite photos of them.

I was only 20-years-old and single when Andy was born - not exactly what my parents had in mind for their daughter. Andy and I lived with my mom and dad until he was four, when I met and married Todd.

But as God so often does, he turned that difficult time into such a blessing for everyone. Not only has Andy been a wonderful son, he has become close to my dad in a way he probably wouldn't have, had he not lived in the same home with my parents for the first four years of his life.

While neither my dad, my husband, nor my son is perfect, each is special to me, and to one another, in their own way. They have all helped to make me who I am today, in they have all helped me draw closer to God (often at times when that was the last thing on their minds!) :)

On this Father's Day, I celebrate the father my dad has been to me (and still is), the father my precious husband is to my three children, and the father my son will one day be. But especially, I celebrate my heavenly Father, who IS perfect and is the perfect role model of what a father should be.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Education, Full Circle

2007-06-13T09:40:00.000-05:00

A cool thing happened yesterday afternoon.

I was sitting in our living room beginning to plan our homeschool curriculum for next year. This time last year, I already had everything planned out for the next school year; books were bought and weekly lists were even made. This year, I've just now begun thinking about it.

Samantha, my 14-year-old, sat down with me and wanted to see her reading list for next year. She'll be doing ancient history, so her reading list consists of Homer, Plato, Aristotle, and such. She'll read plays, histories, and big chunks of the Bible, that she's already read in the past.

As we went over the list, Andy, who's getting ready to enter his second full year of college (with two years of credits under his belt) sat down with us. Andy is majoring in Classical Studies at a local university, so he was very interested in what Sam will study next year. He remembers studying this same curriculum in the 9th grade. His first reading of Homer's Iliad is what gave him a taste for ancient literature and brought him to where he is today.

Andy pointed out, however, the flaws in his own 9th grade education. He showed me how going through the ancient list chronologically, is much more difficult. He explained that the histories need to be read first, and then the plays and stories will make more sense when put into the historical context. We had a great discussion about the differences (and similarities) between ancient Greece and Rome, and I learned a lot of new things.

All in all, *I* felt more educated at the end of it.

Andy also pointed out that he has copies of every book on Sam's reading list, and that although he'll be 45 minutes away in the dorm this fall, she can use his books and they can discuss things over the phone and email.

When we finished up, I thanked Andy for his insight and I was thankful once again that he's home. We've come full circle...

I began teaching him more than eleven years ago, when I first took him out of school in the second grade. At some point along the way, he began learning independently and taking his own initiative; I was no longer really teaching him, but rather, guiding him and learning WITH him. Today, he is teaching me, and we are still learning together.

Sometimes I wonder if homeschooling is still the best thing for my kids. Sometimes I get discouraged and want to quit. Sometimes I just want them all to go to school and leave me alone to lie in the sun or play on my computer.

But then a day like yesterday happens and I remember how precious these times are. I also realize our time together is slowly dwindling away. My babies are almost all grown up. Yesterday, God gave me the reminder (and encouragement) I needed to carry on.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Junk Relocation

2007-06-12T22:12:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I cleaned out our garage. This is a twice-a-year ritual that we really should do once-a-month, but we don't, so you can imagine the things that accumulate there. Aside from all the dirt, dead leaves, dead (and alive) bugs and spiders, trash, and various pieces of junk, we also have things to give away, things which have no particular space to reside, and of course things with which we simply don't know WHAT to do.

Yesterday, while all my kids were at the beach and my hubby was out of town, I spent six hours out there dealing with it all. I found a really special place for all those things, too - the town dump. I found, too, that it was much easier to relocate all the junk to the dump when no one else was home. So far, no one has missed anything, and I doubt they ever will.

That's one summer project down, 47 to go.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Summer Relaxation. Not.

2007-06-11T19:07:00.000-05:00

So, every year, just after Christmas break, we start looking forward to summer vacation. I always try to plan school so that we're finished by the first of June. That way we'll have all of June, July and August for a break from the studies.

Yet, when summer arrives, or rather, when SPRING arrives, we start down this insane path of busy-ness that carries far into the summer. It usually starts with yard work and spring cleaning, but it carries over into getting rid of all the junk in the basement (that mysteriously reappears each year), painting rooms, taking day trips, and cleaning out someone's room so a relative can come for an overnight visit.

Over the weekend, I printed out a calendar of the entire summer on one page - today through the first week in September. Boy, was THAT depressing. It's so SMALL. And it's already so FULL!

Now, though we're only ONE day into our summer vacation (yeah, we got going late because we put off testing until last week), I'm feeling overwhelmed by the summer and all it has in store for us. It sort of makes me look forward to fall, so we can fall back into our comfortable school routine.

Did I just say that? Somebody slap me.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Turning 40...

2007-06-07T16:33:00.001-05:00

... is so great.

I feel like I know who I am, what I like, and I don't care what anyone else thinks of me. Sure, there are 25-year-olds who are that way, but it's taken me a bit longer!

Here are some of the highlights from our day yesterday...

First and foremost, my hubby took the day off from work. Second, we had a sunny, blue sky day for the first time in over a week! We went out to breakfast at a local deli right on the main street of town (just the two of us) and let the kids sleep in. Then we went and browsed through a couple of book stores. I found something to keep me busy...

Then we came back home to lots of flowers and cake - actually, the flowers AND cakes have pretty much trickled in over the last FEW days, but those are just details. Here are a few of the pics...

Flowers from my mom:

Flowers from my dad:

Flowers from a friend:

Flowers from another friend (displayed by my two favorite girls!):

A single red rose from my single favorite guy - uh, yeah, my husband. :)

Cakes from two different friends:

And a HUGE balloon:

But the best gift of all is one I already had...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Today...

2007-06-06T21:06:00.000-05:00

...was all about me. :)

I turned 40-years-old. It was a wonderful day all the way around; tomorrow I'll share photos and more!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Standardized Testing

2007-06-04T21:08:00.000-05:00

Today we started our end-of-the-year week with the Iowa Basic. Oddly enough, my kids LOVE to take this test. In spite of having colds and pouring down rain outside, they awakened early and were eager to start filling in those zillions of circles. I imagine that by the end of the week, they'll feel differently.

When I tried to capture a quiet testing moment on the camera, one of the girls couldn't resist looking up when she heard the camera beep. (See if you can guess which one).

I told her to look back dwon at her test booklet - I wanted the photo to look official! But EACH time the camera beeped, darned if she didn't look up again. You can't tell from the photos but we all started laughing hysterically between shots... then she'd give her "don't bother me, I'm testing" face.

Finally I got a shot that "looks" official, LOL.

Here is the sequence:

If only I could channel her nonsense energy into something useful. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Busy Day

2007-05-31T07:08:00.000-05:00

It often seems that we need a Spring Vacation rather than a summer vacation. I'm not talking about a week off in March when we don't really do anything at all but wish for warm weather. I mean the entire month of May. This is the time of year when school is pared down to fit with everything else we need to do. Here is an example - our day yesterday was a doozy...

12:20 a.m. – Went to sleep much too late after staying up late to watch the season finale of Boston Legal.

4:40 a.m. – I was awakened by a very annoying Phoebe bird outside my window. Got up, did some paperwork, cleaned out my purse, made hubby’s lunch, fed dogs and cats, and got dressed. 13yo Molly woke up (uncharicteristically) at 5:30.

6:10 a.m. – Drove a grumpy hubby to work (our other car, the 20-year-old jeep, has been in the shop for a month). Molly went along, so we could make a return at Walmart. We did a bit of shopping as well, as Walmart was sublimely empty at that time of day.

7:30 a.m. – Returned home, woke Sam, made breakfast, collected garbage & recyclables, collected Salvation Army donations, and loaded everything into the van.

8:35 a.m. – Left home with Sam to run errands while Molly stayed home to do independent schoolwork. We first took everything to the dump.

9:00 a.m. – Stopped by the town hall to register the van and hubby’s small boat.

9:20 a.m. – Went to the vet to pick up special food for aging dog – turns out they were all out.

9:30 a.m. – Filled up the van with gas. Ugh - gas prices!

9:50 a.m. – Dropped off donations at Salvation Army.

10:05 a.m. – Ran van through quickie car wash.

10:30 a.m. – Took Sam to chiropractor.

11:00 a.m. – Took van for annual inspection.

11:45 a.m. – Arrived home and made lunch – leftovers, thankfully.

12:30 p.m. – Began mowing front lawn before rains were to arrive. Mower made strange coughing sounds.

1:20 p.m. – Finished front lawn, called hubby for advice on sick mower.

1:30 p.m. – Changed spark plug in lawn mower (all by myself).

1:40 p.m. – Mowed back lawn.

2:15 p.m. – Swept back deck and stacked chairs for rainstorm.

2:30 p.m. – Took a shower (finally).

3:00 p.m. – Straightened my room, made the bed, folded laundry, and listened to Money Matters on the radio.

3:30 p.m. – Cleaned kitchen, supervised school work.

4:00 p.m. – Made Amish Friendship Bread with Molly.

4:30 p.m. – Dried hair – finished it off, anyway. Contemplated a nap before picking up hubby at 6:00 – but got a call from him that he’d be ready by 5:00.

4:45 p.m. – Left to pick up hubby from work.

5:00 p.m. – Found a very cheerful hubby.

5:05 p.m. – Although he was cheerful, hubby told me he spoke to our mechanic today and it seems our dear old jeep has finally died. We both agreed we ought to have it cremated and keep it on our mantle. But we don’t have a mantle.

5:30 p.m. – Went to video store to get a movie for the evening, and realized I totally and completely forgot about preparing or thawing anything for dinner.

5:40 p.m. – Went to local pizza place with hubby for a surprise date.

6:30 p.m. – Arrived home with pizza for kids.

7:00 p.m. – Gave dog new food, with which he wasn’t thrilled.

7:15 p.m. – Popped in movie (Night at the Museum) and sat down to veg. I struggled to stay awake through it, though it was hilarious.

8:30 p.m. – Got a call from firewood delivery guy saying they’ll be here next week. Hubby looked at newspaper ads for cars.

8:55 p.m. – I sat down to read email and surf the net, but will instead go to sleep and start all over again tomorrow…

And now it is today... hubby took our only car to work and it is raining, so life is a lot quieter. Ahhhh...

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Update on Samantha

2007-05-31T06:52:00.000-05:00

Last week we visited Boston Children's Hospital. This was after seeing the only pediatric neurologist in Maine (for several years) and determining that he was less than helpful. Our new neurologist at the Children's Hospital is wonderful. She has given us a new treatment plan, as well as follow-ups, and we are feeling very hopeful.

I suppose that's the most important thing right now - hope.

Not only does this doctor want to try a new headache prevention medication, she has also suggested more alternative treatments such as acupuncture and biofeedback. I so appreciate a doctor who is open minded and doesn't rely only on chemicals.

All in all, we had a great day in Boston!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

More Academics... Not.

2007-05-14T14:41:00.000-05:00

For the past two weeks we've been moving our backyard fence. It was put up in a hurry when we moved here several years ago. We had small children and young dogs, and we needed to contain them all. We have a very woodsy back lot, so we simply put up the fence where it was easy - but it was a good 10 - 20 feet shy of the property line.

Knowing the area beyond the fence was ours, we tended to throw junk over the fence. Leaves, dead branches, and such.

But now that everyone is older, we wanted the fence to contain the entire property, as it originally should have. Consequently, it meant digging up roots, tearing out trees, and of course, dealing with all the "stuff" we threw back there over the years. What a mess.

So the past week found Maine with wonderfully dry weather in the mid 60s. This found us doing minimal academic work and major spring clean up work. Today we finished the bulk of the job. The remainder of the leaves are bagged and will go to the dump tomorrow. All the trees and branches that we took down are in a neat pile next to our garage, and will go to the dump as soon as we rent, beg, borrow, or steal a trailer in which to transport them.

How do I list this on a portfolio? Botany? Forest skills? Slave labor?

Either way, here is what it looks like:

BEFORE ~ (at 8:30 this morning)

AFTER ~ (at 3:00 this afternoon)

And a bigger view of that side of the yard...

See the fence WAY back there? It used to come just around the shed with only a few feet to spare. Now we have SO much room without buying more land - who knew? :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

What we REALLY did today...

2007-05-04T20:56:00.000-05:00

This first picture is associated with what I'd like everyone to think we do each day in our homeschooling. We do these academics, but today, there was less book learning and more hands-on things. In fact, the whole week has been like that.

Although we had one of the best weather weeks of the year, we spent much of it indoors, nursing our little dog back to health. I'll spare you the gory details, but this adorable little guy has been very sick:

We were able to bring him home last night, and I kept him on the IV in his own little bed. In spite of our best efforts, the bed was ruined (and it was old, anyway) so we bought him this new bed this evening.

We did get to spend a little time outside, raking leaves and doing the spring yard clean-up. We're not finished, but it WAS a beautiful day:

And our garden is already under-way:

Of course, in Maine, nothing can safely be planted outside until after Memorial Day, because of the possibility of frost, but this is our better-late-than-never pre-garden.

When we weren't working in the yard, tending our seed-garden, and nursing our dog back to health, I made sourdough bread over and over and over. I found the Perfect Recipe at my friend, Barb's blog, a couple of weeks ago. It takes a long time, but the vast majority of the time involved is simply waiting for the sourdough to do it's thing. So far, even with little variations I've tried, it's come out perfect every time. Here's the latest:

Have a great weekend, friends.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

If You Pray...

2007-05-02T21:11:00.000-05:00

Please pray for Heather.

To make a donation on her behalf, Click Here.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Basketball

2007-04-28T07:27:00.000-05:00

I have to share these pics of my youngest. We are in awe because neither of us played basketball, and she is doing so well... and she's only 13.

She's the one with the ball.

#34

This weekend is the final tournament.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Babysitting

2007-04-13T07:47:00.000-05:00

We're babysitting this little cutie for 11 days. He's a 10-month-old Yorkie. Our giant Shepherd is fascinated by him, but also jealous. Part of the reason we agreed to do this was to get any wayward desire of getting another dog out of our systems. He's less trained than we expected, so in that regard, it's working; yet, I also find myself getting attached to the little guy. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Update on Sam

2007-03-18T14:36:00.000-05:00

The last time I posted here, I was in quite a slump about our daughter, Samantha. The chronic headaches were getting worse and our family doctor was being less than helpful.

In the past few weeks, Sam has regularly been seeing a chiropractor and a physical therapist, and the results have been nothing short of miraculous. After months of the doctors and neurologists throwing drugs and anti-depressants at her, she is finally getting some relief. The headaches have not yet gone away completely, but I say "not yet" because they are not nearly as intense and far less frequent. She is enjoying life again!

We are hopeful that the headaches will disappear completely and life will go back to normal, whatever that is. Of course, this takes away all my wonderful excuses for being lazy about academics. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

The Power of Pets

2007-03-02T17:43:00.000-05:00

The headache saga continues in our home, but there has been hope and a small bit of improvement.

One thing that has been so heartwarming is how all four of our very different pets have been sympathetic and caring toward Samantha. We have two very friendly dogs, one very friendly cat, and one very UNfriendly cat. But over the past few weeks, even the unfriendly cat has had some sense about Sam. The cat has sought out Sam and shown love (in an unfriendly cat way) toward a hurting girl.

Below is a picture I took this morning of Samantha with our German Shepherd, Roxanne. Roxanne is not the cuddling, hugging type, but she knew Sam wasn't feeling well, and she cuddled right up. Needless to say, it DID make Sam feel better.

And it made me smile. :)

Struggling

2007-02-25T20:56:00.000-05:00

We have been homeschooling for more than eleven years now, and it seems that every single year, we have had something unexpected happen, something that in some way derails our academic efforts.

It is always at these times that I try to remember (though I usually fail) that this business of homeschooling is not all about academics, books and curriculum. Rather, it is about learning how to live in this world, how to deal with illnesses, conflict, and family tragedy, and how to do it all with grace.

Usually our difficulties bombard us by about mid-October, well before the Christmas holidays, but this year, it came a bit late. This year, it started (and isn't over yet) just before Thanksgiving.

This year, our 14-year-old daughter, Sam, is struggling with chronic, severe headaches. When I say chronic and severe, I mean that she is having headaches every day, and at least half the time they are at migraine intensity. We have seen our family doctor and the neurologist multiple times, she has had several tests, and we have tried several types of medications. So far nothing has worked.

Our next mode of treatment lies in physical therapy and with the chiropractor. We also may need to get her into counseling because she is so demoralized and depressed from the constant pain.

I have to say that I'm feeling pretty demoralized and depressed as well. All of us moms know how hard it is to watch our children hurt and not be able to do anything about it. Today, my heart broke as she suffered through another headache and cried, "I'm so sick of hurting." I, like all other moms, would take the pain on myself if I could.

In addition to juggling the doctors appointments, trying a variety of meds, and trying to make my dear daughter comfortable amidst the pain, I am also struggling to keep the house in order and keep our academics on an even keel. The ugly truth is that Sam is beginning to fall behind in her academics (even though, in reality, she is years ahead of where she needs to be) and I'm feeling the crunch of the well-planned curriculum that I organized last summer. I've been feeling so stressed about the fact that we're falling behind, I haven't stopped to look at the big picture.

Then last week I got an email from my dear friend, Beth that said this:
"Honestly, if Sam were in public school, she wouldn't be going to school feeling like this, so don't worry about taking the time off of school. You needn't feel ANY guilt about that at all, so take that off the table right now, you hear?"

Sometimes a friend says something in a way that just hits me the right way at the right time. This was simple and to the point, but it was just what I needed to hear when I needed to hear it. Nothing is more important, right now, than getting to the bottom of these headaches. This is our life right now, and that is what we teach in homeschooling: life.

The frustration isn't over yet, but I feel a bit freer to let the academics go for a bit longer while we continue pursuing treatments and hopefully, a cure for Sam. Please pray for us.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

A Wintertime Bubble Experiment

2007-02-07T09:44:00.000-05:00

Several years ago, my children and I tried blowing bubbles in sub-zero temperatures. Check out my Maine BLOG to read the story.

Keep warm this winter! :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Homemaking Survey

2007-02-06T08:44:00.000-05:00

I grew up watching my mom refuse to write the term "homemaker" on applications, tax forms, etc. She said it was demeaning and degrading. Instead, she wrote the term, "domestic engineer." She said it sounded more important - like a real job.

I'm not writing this to bust on my mom - she was actually a great homemaker (sorry Mom, you were and are) but she was also a product of the 60s and 70s, when women were told that the only job that mattered was one that took us out of the home and gave us a paycheck.

By the time I got married and had children, I was a fairly decent feminist; yet somewhere deep down inside, I WANTED to be a homemaker. I just didn't want anyone to call me that. Today, I've gotten past all that and I want to pass the legacy to my daughters that calling oneself a homemaker is not only a good thing, but to do it well is a highly accomplished art.

I found this fun little survey on my friend Kris' Blog. Since, at nearly 40, I feel like I'm finally beginning to really learn what it means to be a homemaker, I can actually do a survey like this and not balk. :)

Aprons - Y/N?
What’s an apron? No, seriously, I think I have an apron somewhere in the house, but I'm not sure. I've never ever worn one, unless you count the summer during college that I worked as a waitress. Somehow, the apron thing is one area I can't deal with. Maybe that will come when I turn 50?

Baking - Favorite thing to bake:
Pumpkin bread. It's insanely easy, delicious, makes 2 loaves at once, and makes the house smell heavenly.

Clothesline - Y/N?
We live in Maine. We have three clotheslines in our basement, near the wood-burning stove. Our backyard is big enough for a clothesline, but summers in Maine are hot, humid, and VERY buggy. I don't want black flies in my sheets or underwear.

Donuts - Have you ever made them?
No - just eaten them. Way too many times. But I'd love a great recipe for apple fritters - anyone have one?

Every day - One homemaking thing you do every day:
Cook dinner, make the bed. Ok, that's two things.

Freezer - Do you have a separate deep freeze?
Yes - in the basement. But what I'd really like is a second refrigerator. With three teens in the house (and all their friends constantly here) we need more fridge space.

Garbage Disposal - Y/N?
No - septic system won't tolerate it. However, it's one thing I miss way more than a dishwasher.

Handbook - What is your favorite homemaking resource?
My friends! And the internet. Friends on the internet. Yeah.

Ironing - Love it or Hate it?
I won't discuss this, other than to say - I'm not sure where my iron is. Wash and wear is the ONLY way to go.

Junk Drawer - Y/N?
You mean, just one?

Kitchen - Color and decorating scheme?
Ugh - soon to be redecorated - - - sandy/peach walls with brown trim, white cabinets. Soon to be with white trim, white cabinets, and yellow walls, with red bricks from the chair-railing to the floor.

Love - What is your favorite part of homemaking?
The final product. I don't yet enjoy cleaning, laundry, etc. (I said "yet" because I'm aspiring to enjoy it - a little, at least) but I sort of like baking now. What I really like is the satisfaction of a job well done - a sparkling clean floor or stove, a delicious meal, a closet full of clean clothes and an empty laundry area.

Mop - Y/N?
You mean, do I? Yes. In fact, I'd like to rip out all our carpet and have ONLY wood floors or tile.

Nylons - Wash by hand or in the washing machine?
I haven't worn nylons in years. Well, maybe once. If I did, I threw them in the washing machine. I know this because I wash NOTHING by hand.

Oven - Do you use the window or open the door to check?
It has no window, so------

Pizza - What do you put on yours?
Tomato sauce, garlic, cheese, sometimes pepperoni, muchrooms, and/or peppers.

Quiet - What do you do during the day when you get a quiet moment?
Catch a nap, do email, or read. Usually nap.

Recipe card box - Y/N? What does it look like?
An old plastic one that belonged to my mom when she first married. The main "box" I use is a stack of recipes I printed off the internet - they are stuffed into an ancient Betty Crocker cookbook. I keep meaning to print them all on neat little cards and put them into the box... but alas...

Style of house - What is the style of your house?
New England Cape - I love it!

Tablecloths and napkins - Y/N?
Tablecloth sometimes, place mats sometimes, napkins always but usually they're paper.

Under the kitchen sink - Organized or toxic wasteland?
Organized and proud of it!

Vacuum - How many times per week?
Once/week. More if the dog is shedding - ugh.

Wash - How many loads of laundry do you do per week?
About 4-5, but usually all in one day. My kids do all their own laundry on other days.

Do you keep a list of things to do that you cross off?
Oh yeah - it's a necessity for me. I need that endorphin rush of checking or crossing things off.

Yard - Y/N? Who does what?
Grrr. I wanted a house with minimal yard care - you know, woods and such. My husband wanted a BIG lawn. I agreed to the big lawn if HE would take care of it. He does it perhaps once/year. The rest of the time either the kids and I do it, or it just looks bad. Oh, and he always plants a garden that I have to maintain. I haven't yet graduated to gardening, but I'm trying... still, I'm too busy trying to be a homemaker, not a gardener! :P

Zzz's - What is your last homemaking task before going to bed?
Now that it's winter - stuff the woodstove, check on everyone, make tomorrow's list, and then pass out.

How about you? You're IT!

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Baking from Scratch

2007-01-28T21:10:00.000-05:00

When I was growing up, the one thing I learned in the kitchen was how to bake a cake - from a box. It wasn't that my mom didn't cook; rather, I just always seemed to be doing something else when she was cooking.

By the time I got married, I was vaguely familiar with the idea of baking from scratch, but it was more of a novelty than a reality. I figured the cannister set that I received as a wedding gift was to hold those rarely used items like flour and sugar; for what, I really wasn't sure.

Early in our marriage, my mother-in-law passed several recipes on to me - recipes that, apparently, were my husband's favorites. Things such as special Christmas cookies, casseroles, stews and such. Rather than actually make these things, I opted for simple substitutes like things out of a can. I did, however, obtain a bread machine and made bread that way, so I felt pretty domestic doing that.

Several years ago, I even had a neighbor who not only baked all her own bread (without a bread machine), but she also ground all her own flour. I felt like she and I were from different planets.

In recent years, however, I've gradually been learning how to cook from scratch and I'm actually discovering the satisfaction that can come from it. I began slowly, just making cookies from some of the old cookbooks my mom passed on to me. Then I started making other things: pumpkin bread, cakes, snack items, and a few casseroles.

As I baked, my daughters became interested, and I realized I could change the legacy I had mistakenly been leaving them. I want my girls to know how to do the things I did not, to feel comfortable in a kitchen and to know how to make a grocery list. I might have had a decent high school education, a B.A. in Literature, and a few graduate classes, but I didn't know there was more than one type of flour. I could teach my children at home all the way through high school with a whole slew of Bible and academics, but I couldn't show them the basics about how to make bread or roll out flour.

One of my good internet friends, Barb, has been a wealth of information for me with her special cooking site, My Sister's Kitchen. She's been helping me learn, not only with her helpful hints, but with her assurances that ANYONE can do this. Be sure to check it out and tell Barb I sent you.

Like every year, this year our homeschool is including yet another new subject: basic cooking. My two daughters and I are taking it together.

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Wise Words from my Favorite Poet...

2007-01-25T22:31:00.000-05:00

"Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence."

~ Robert Frost

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

Basketball and School Dances

2007-01-18T21:50:00.000-05:00

Well, our youngest daughter, Molly just became a teenager and we are well into the thick of her basketball season. She is on the local middle school team as well as a recreational travel team. We have either basketball practice or a game nearly every day of the week, including weekends.

It sounds overwhelming, but Molly is currently our only child in competitive sports. A few years ago, both our daughters were playing basketball and our son was running indoor track. We were constantly doing the juggling act of trying to cheer them all on and be in three places at the same time... during the frigid Maine winter, no less.

But now, we are having a blast. My husband and I are in awe of our daughter's ability on the basketball court, since neither of us ever even thought about playing the game when we were in school. We love cheering, talking with the other parents, and talking game strategies over dinner.

Molly has made some wonderful friends on her team - girls that she will mostly likely play basketball with through high school. This afternoon, after her most recent game, a couple of the girls on the team invited her to go to the middle school dance. This isn't something we had planned on, nor are we thrilled about the beginnings of anything related to boy-girl parings; yet, these are good girls from nice families.

Sigh. It's never easy beginning the process of letting our kids go. Don't get me wrong - while we have given Molly permission to go to this dance with her friends, we've put very clear parameters around it and future such events. We aren't letting her go, we're just letting her stand up in the nest and stretch her wings a bit. :)

Copyright © 2007 - Paulla Estes

End of Year Panic

2006-12-31T17:39:00.000-05:00

A month ago, I had grandiose plans about how well we had been doing with school through the entire fall season. As a result, I gave us all a much needed break and my kids only did half days for the first part of December. We took two solid weeks off for Christmas, with the set-in-stone plan to start up again full force on January 2, 2007.

Well, here we are and its New Year's Eve. One of my daughters has been sick since last week with a nasty cold/cough. I caught it three days ago, and now my husband and son seem to be getting it. We had relatives here for a belated Christmas visit this weekend, and tomorrow is our wedding anniversary, not to mention, a big football day in our house!

In order to methodically begin school again on the 2nd, I need to spend a couple of hours revising our schedule, since we botched it a bit in early December. I also need to take down all the Christmas decorations and clean the house. Getting over this cold would be nice, too; oh, and my husband and I are planning to go out to dinner tomorrow night to celebrate our anniversary. Hmmm - decisions, decisions. Will I REALLY do all that in the next 24 hours?

I think not.

Instead, I'm going to go get the meat ready for our traditional New Year's Eve Fondue tonight, and then I might catch a quick nap, so I can actually stay up until midnight. Tomorrow, I'm going to enjoy the day and plan to take that work day on Tuesday - with my kids' help - and only IF I'm feeling better. We might start school on Wednesday, if I'm ready, but I've found that starting school when I'm only half ready and my heart's not in it, is much worse than waiting a few more days.

Either way, my kids will learn something... that breaks can be ok, that work days are important, that moms are imperfect (to say the least) and that the best laid plans often must be put aside. That's the beauty of homeschooling - they learn no matter what I do. :)

Happy New Year!

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Giving

2006-12-24T06:46:00.000-05:00

This year, as usual, our kids all put aside some of their allowance and birthday gift money to use on Christmas gifts for family and friends. But when shopping time came, my 12-year-old daughter, Molly, had high hopes for the gifts for everyone on her list; they weren't expensive for me, but way out of her price range. I decided to give her a bit of extra money to spend at Christmas.

When we went shopping last week, Molly knew exactly what she wanted to buy, but when we arrived at the stores, she discovered even more of a price discrepancy than I had imagined. Since we were short on time and she had such a giving spirit, I helped her out even more with the money, and though it troubled her that I kept giving her money, she was elated about the gifts she was buying. She even bought two things for her dad.

Ironically, Molly has also been knitting scarves for several of her friends. She's spent every waking moment over the last several weeks with the knitting needles clicking away. Yesterday, the 23rd, she finished the last one. Then this morning, at 5:30, I awakened to hear the familiar clicking in her bedroom across the hall, and I could see that her light was on.

Like one of Santa's helpers, she was in bed, furiously knitting yet another new scarf. When I walked into her room, she had a look of serious concentration on her face and informed me that she had somehow forgotten one of her friends and simply had to finish this scarf before the Christmas Eve service at church tonight. I told her that if she didn't, she could give her friend an IOU card, but she wasn't content with that, and asked if we could stop by a store after church this morning. The thought of going shopping on Christmas Eve is not something I relish, but I do want to encourage her giving spirit.

I've found that although I've felt rushed, tired, and a bit frustrated by the whole Christmas season this year, my daughter simply wants to give. She even told me that she wished she had $500.00 just to spend on gifts for her friends and family.

Once again, I'm learning from my kids.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Perspectives

2006-12-18T09:20:00.000-05:00

Each year I find that our school plans go along quite well until about the time we switch back from Daylight Savings Time. For some reason, the sudden onset of dark afternoons and cold weather just sort of slow me down. In September and October, I'm energized and excited about homeschooling. By the first week in November, I feel burnt out and need a break. Perhaps that's why the public schools take frequent breaks throughout the year? Sometimes we do just that, or we'll cut back and only do half days through Christmas.

This year, in spite of the slow-down, we pressed on through November and kept our schooling at full-force. We'd planned to take off an entire week for Thanksgiving, and I did not want to get behind. For me, there's nothing worse than getting behind. In spite of the rigorous schedule and difficult course load for my 7th and 8th grade daughters, we kept up full days until the day before we were to leave on our vacation. It was then that I realized the burn out.

I was exhausted, nothing was ready for our trip, and my oldest daughter was suffering from recurrent headaches - and I had basically been pretending they weren't there. In a mad rush, we packed for our trip, minimally cleaned the house, and headed for the grandparents' house, four hours away. We spent the first couple of days away just recovering. Thankfully, we didn't have to do much socializing or cooking until three days into our trip. But I also realized that Thanksgiving is when we often swap Christmas gifts with our family that we won't be seeing again before Christmas; this year, I'd completely forgotten that Christmas was just around the corner. How had this happened?

When we returned from our Thanksgiving break, I'd had time to ponder just how far behind I was - not in schooling, but in the rest of my life. The house needed some serious cleaning, we needed to start Christmas shopping, and of course there was decorating, getting the tree, baking, doing Christmas cards, planning get-togethers, and there was also my daughter's birthday to celebrate. Last on my over-loaded Christmas list was the happy family time and relaxation. And I'm ashamed to say that the real meaning of Christmas had escaped me altogether.

How had THAT happened?

So, a few days after returning from Thanksgiving, I awakened early in the morning to get started on all the millions of things I had to do. I threw in a load of laundry, started to take out things for the evening meal, and I scrambled to organize the books and school lists for the next couple of weeks before our Christmas break. I also made lists of all the places I needed to go, which would take a miracle what with school being so rigorous this year. It was only 6:30 in the morning and I had been up for about 45 minutes when I simply fell apart. I sat down on the sofa and cried, wanting to just run away from this whole Christmas thing. I had lists all around me, as well as my daily planning calendar, and they all seemed to have evil grins as they barked their so-called necessities at me.

It was then, in that early morning moment, with no one else yet awake, that I was quietly reminded about the real meaning of Christmas. I felt the gentle comfort that only God can give as I sat there and cried hopelessly. I shoved all my lists and paperwork aside and picked up my Bible, which I had scarcely opened in the last few weeks. I don't even remember what I read that morning, but it didn't matter - my focus was turned back toward God and suddenly my perspective was changed. I asked God what could be eliminated from my crazy plans so that I might focus on the birth of Christ this season, and just as importantly, encourage my children to have that focus.

It was on that day, in early December, that I cancelled all school other than reading and math. I eliminated a few other so-called necessities from my lists and I felt lighter than I'd felt in a long time. Since then, in the past couple of weeks, my daughters and I have had fun baking, doing Christmas crafts, listening to Christmas music, and shopping leisurely. We have stayed up late watching Christmas movies, and we've had time to talk, laugh, and ponder the true meaning of Christmas.

After more than ten years of homeschooling, one would think I'd have learned such lessons, but I am reminded this year that I will never stop learning. I'm just thankful that God showed me these lessons before, rather than after, the fact. Now, a week from Christmas, our house is cozy, calm, and happy. There will be plenty of time for academics in January - for now, the schooling is about the love of Christ and keeping the proper perspective.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Skidboot the Dog

2006-10-24T06:15:00.000-05:00

This is a video that was sent to me this week over email from a good friend who moved far away. :( My children and I saw this dog several years ago on a contest on Animal Planet (this is mentioned in the video) and we fell in love with the dog, then. This is an amazing story that you'll never forget.


A heart-warming segment from Texas Country Reporter, with Bob Phillips. For more information visit www.TexasCountryReporter.com or www.skidboot.com

Homeschool P.E.

2006-10-16T06:43:00.000-05:00

Physical Education in the homeschool is the one thing that scared me most when I first took my oldest child out of public school in the 2nd grade. After growing up in the public school system and letting P.E. always remain something that someone else planned for me, I didn't know what to do with my son. In my narrow mind, I thought P.E. had to be held in a school gymnasium for it to count. I thought we would have to purchase tumbling mats, red rubber balls, and hang a thick rope from the rafters in our garage. When I read the educational requirements for our state and found that P.E. was on the list, I panicked. I knew I could teach my son math. I was fairly sure I could teach him to read and write. But sports? Fitness? Forget it. My idea of fitness was riding bikes, hiking, swimming at the beach and going for walks around the neighborhood.

Yet, I soon learned that THOSE things are what P.E. is all about. If my son never played dodge ball in the public school gymnasium, he wasn't going to lack in life skills. That 2nd grade year, we put him in little league, but he hated it. The next year, he was on a soccer team and begged to quit. I was afraid we were going to fail the state requirements for P.E., but then he decided he wanted to play flag football. That lasted a couple of years and then he went on to basketball for a few more years. Finally, in 9th grade, he discovered track and cross country at the local high school, where he was allowed to compete. He also took up road biking and weight lifting on his own. Now, at 19, he runs, bikes, and works out regularly; not only did he fulfill the state requirements in P.E. to graduate from high school, more importantly, he has a life habit of wanting to stay fit.

Our two daughters have taken their own paths. Our middle daughter enjoys recreational soccer, but she has no interest in the competitive teams. Her loves are ice-skating and horseback riding, so we find lessons where we can - and thankfully, here in Maine, ice skating is not hard to find in the winter time! Our youngest daughter is very athletically inclined and has found that basketball is her passion. She plays on two teams each year, one recreational and one competitive, and she also plays soccer and ice skates with her sister.

In this age of computers and television, the most important Physical Education we can teach our children is to get out of the house and get moving. As homeschoolers, if they never learn to play dodge ball, volley ball or basketball, it's not the end of the world; but we want them to understand the importance of aerobic exercise and keeping their bodies healthy and fit... ironically, something I never learned in public school...

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Uniqueness

2006-10-09T05:48:00.000-05:00

When I was homeschooling my son, Andy, through high school, it often felt like pulling teeth. Don't get me wrong; he was a hard worker when he put his mind to something.

For instance, when he was studying for his HAM radio license at the age of 12, he used to get up on his own every day at 6:00 a.m. to watch the video tutor and study his notes. He also awakened early to bring firewood into the house during the winter and he was very diligent with his afternoon paper route. When he was old enough to get a job, he always showed up to work on time and had a strong work ethic.

Yet, when I showed him how to use a calendar and a day-timer to keep track of his studies and activities, I might as well have been teaching him Chinese. He simply didn't latch on to it. When I drilled him on his spelling words, he didn't see the importance of learning to spell correctly in an age of computers and spell-checkers.

All through his high school years, I felt like I was failing Andy because he didn't take notes like a normal person and he didn't seem to have consistent study habits. I was afraid he'd wither in college; yet he's now in his second year of college classes, and he's not only doing well, he's excelling. He still has very weird and erratic study habits, in my opinion, but whatever he does, it's working for him.

That's when I have to remember that I've trained him up in the way he should go (for the most part, anyway) and he has to take that path according to his own unique way. Although he spent the first 18 years of his life with me just about every single day, he is his own unique person who, in many ways, is nothing like his mom and dad. But our job wasn't to make him like us, was it? It was to help shape and mold him to be the best HE could be. He is definitely his own person with his own unique way.

Still, I'd feel a lot better if he'd use his day-timer. :)

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

A Good Day

2006-10-03T03:52:00.000-05:00

It seems that for the past few weeks, on any given day, at least one of our daughters has had a rough day. There have been a variety of reasons: one week, Samantha was sick with a cold and Molly caught it the next week. One day Samantha hurt her ankle at soccer practice and she limped around the house for a few days after that. Rude and sarcastic comments directed from sister to sister have often caused tears and hurt feelings. And of course we've dealt with the emotional and hormonal related issues that surround having daughters who are 12 and 13.

On the days that one of us isn't feeling well, that person is usually cut some slack and either doesn't have to participate in school, or is given only the basics. Sometimes a hot cup of cocoa and a bowl of popcorn in bed will incite someone with a cold to finish her math lesson - in bed, of course. Frequent breaks and curling up on the sofa with a blanket can also help. For rude behavior and emotional issues, we often must take a break from the academics and have a heart-to-heart talk. Other times, we chuck everything and watch a favorite old movie on video.

Yesterday evening when my husband came home from work, I paused when he asked about my day. I usually say it was alright and I often give him a few details, either positive or negative. But that day, I realized that for the first time in weeks, we had an exceptionally good day.

Nothing out of the ordinary happened. We got up at about the regular time, ate the regular food and did the regular subjects for school... but there were no negatives: no mishaps, no injuries, no illnesses, no hurt feelings, no lousy attitudes, no reprimands and no tears. I stopped and marveled at the good fortune and I thanked God for it.

I don't expect every day to be that good, but I think it's important that we recognize the good days and give thanks for them when they come. I am reminded that my time at home with my children is fleeting. In just a few short years, they will be grown and perhaps out on their own. I want to savor every moment.

I'm not sure what today will bring, but yesterday was a really good day. :)

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Special Dad-Daughter Times

2006-09-28T06:57:00.000-05:00

A couple of weeks ago, our family was gearing up to go on a church campout near the coast; yet, on the day before the campout, our 12-year-old daughter, Molly, became ill. After going back and forth as to whether or not we should cancel, we decided I would stay home with Molly and my husband, Todd, would take our 13-year-old Samantha. Our 19-year-old son, Andy, already had other plans.

We were all disappointed, but when Todd and Samantha began packing up the tent, the food, and all their supplies, I became excited for them. The weather was perfect and both Todd and I were about to have a night alone each with one of our daughters.

The campout was only one night, and the next day Molly was feeling better, so she and I drove to the campground to meet the others for an outdoor worship service and a cookout. The weather was perfect and a good time was had by all.

Later that evening, Todd shared with me some of the special times he had with Samantha. As she is our quietest and most introverted child, times alone with her can often be less than interactive! But they went for a late night walk on the beach and discovered glowing creatures on the sand; they studied the stars and reminisced about how Samantha first learned about the Big Dipper; and they talked about things they never would have, otherwise.

My heart was warmed by this special dad-daughter time and I mused that I wished I had been there. Todd agreed, but then he stopped himself and said, no, he was glad I wasn't there. He went on to explain that had I been there, while it would have been a fun family time, he never would have captured those special times with his quiet, teen-aged daughter.

How does this pertain to homeschooling? As we wrapped up the conversation about the campout, Todd thanked me for homeschooling our children. He told me Samantha had shared things with him that I had taught her, some of it minor trivia, and some life lessons. He was thoroughly thrilled with the time they had together, and now, nearly two weeks later, he is still talking about it.

I have to say that while my husband has always been completely supportive and helpful about our adventure in homeschooling, I'm not sure that he's ever thanked me. Not that I ever sought thanks or even thought about it. Yet, it made my day. Heck, it made my whole year! And I think it's safe to say that THAT was worth missing out on a family campout. :)

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Teaching when we don't mean to

2006-09-21T10:46:00.000-05:00

Last night at church, our youth leader pulled me aside and asked if our daughters had said anything about last week’s youth group lesson. I drew a blank, as I often do if anyone asks me what happened anytime before five minutes ago, and I told him they might have, but I needed a hint to remember what it might have been.

He reminded me that they are studying Romans and that they’re still in the first few chapters which focus on judgment and are pretty much a downer to study. Oh yes, I remembered now – my girls came home and told me all about it. It was then that the youth leader shared with me something my 12-year-old daughter, Molly, said.

Molly is very smart but she often seems flighty and distracted. While she rarely seems to be listening, she usually misses nothing. The youth leader said that regarding judgment, Molly told him that I showed all my children what it looks like when we sit in judgment of others – that we might have one finger pointed at them, but if we look closely at our hand, we’ll see three fingers pointed right back at ourselves.

The object lesson, obviously, is that rather than sitting in judgment of others, we should always look at ourselves because we usually have something that needs to be fixed. Truth be told, I do not remember sharing this object lesson with my children (perhaps because it happened before five minutes ago). But ironically, I do remember my mother teaching it to me.

This taught me all over again that not only should I willingly and openly share what I have learned with my children, it also tells me that I should be careful about what I say; either way, they will remember it and possibly repeat it. Thankfully, in this case, it was something good – though for the life of me, I still don’t remember saying it!

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Article Recommendation

2006-09-14T20:23:00.000-05:00

I recently read an article by veteran homeschool father and speaker, Reb Bradley of Family Ministries. This article is long and it will take a while to read it, but it is well worth the time and effort.

Reb Bradley has always been a very outspoken commentator on homeschooling issues, family issues, child-raising, etc., and I have heard him speak at homeschool conferences in the past. In this article, he spoke to me... and I saw our family as well as many families I know - on both sides of what he describes.
I could editorialize on what Mr. Bradley says, but I won't. Why don't you read his article, and if you'd like to comment or discuss it, please let me know. You may read the article here:

Solving the Crisis in Homeschooling

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Remembering September 11

2006-09-11T05:42:00.000-05:00

It seems appropriate on the 5th anniversary of the September 11 attacks to recall how it affected our homeschooling that day.

It was a bright, clear, crisp, sunny day here in Maine, much like it was all along the east coast that fateful morning. My children were ages 14, 8 and 7, and we had just started school for the morning. Some mornings I flipped on the news for a few minutes, but not this day. We were in our basement TV room/school room sitting around an old dining room table that had become our school table. At about 10:00, an hour or so into the day, the phone rang. It isn't my policy to pick up the phone during school hours, so I let the answering machine get it; that way, if it's my husband or an urgent call, I can hear the message and pick it up.

My mother's voice came on the machine and it was clear that she was in a panic. She started saying many things that didn't make sense to me - about war, the television, and plane crashes. I quickly picked up the phone and she told me that the world trade center had fallen, the white house had been bombed, and that there were planes going down all over the country. For a moment, I truly thought my mother had suddenly taken a premature plunge into dementia or that she had been drugged or drinking. I told her to calm down and asked her what she was talking about. She told me to turn on the television. So I did.

What I saw shocked me, as it did the rest of the nation. One of the WTC towers had already collapsed, and the second was on fire. There were flashes of the Pentagon in flames, as well. My mother was still saying many things to me on the phone, but I hardly heard her. I just stared in horror. And within moments of my turning on the TV, I watched, live, as the second tower fell. My mom started crying, I started crying, and then I remembered my children. I looked around and realized they were standing next to me, taking in all that was happening on the screen.

Later, I spoke to many parents and read many articles about how much or how little we should expose our children to what happened that day. Later, I compared notes with friends about how they handled it and what they did and did not tell their kids.

But that morning, while it was happening, I just huddled my children around me and we watched it all together. We prayed together, they asked questions, and I answered as best I could. They watched wide-eyed as I grieved, and they saw their daddy come home from work when his company closed later that morning. They saw us hug one another, and he huddled with us to watch some more.

Looking back, I don't regret any of it. Yes, I could have shielded my children from much of the horror, but in my opinion, they were old enough and exposed enough to handle what they saw - with me there to guide them as we went through it together. I wouldn't presume to make that decision for any other family, but for our family, it was right. For our children, at their ages on that day, it was right.

Today I am thankful that we were together on September 11. We were safe at home in a small town in Maine, but like everyone else in the country, we were frightened and did not know the extent of what was going on until later that day, later that week. I am thankful that I could be with my children that day and lead them through a horrific event for our nation, as well as hopefully model for them the understandable grief, shock and pain that we felt for all involved.

As the years have passed, our family has watched while much of the nation has seemingly forgotten what happened. I know we never will, as those images were permanently seared in our minds and hearts. My prayer is that this anniversary will give America and the world pause to remember the many lives lost that day. The world changed for us that day, and it will never be the same. We don't know why God allowed this to happened, but thankfully, we know he is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Our world might have changed, but our God did not, and sometimes, that's all we have to hold onto.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Mutant Sunflower

2006-09-06T14:59:00.000-05:00

Each spring I plan to do a big gardening project with my children. I imagine that we will start our own seedlings in the sunny living room while the snow still blankets the lawn, and by the end of May (when the almanac says it's safe to plant outside here in Maine) we will have a garden that's well on its way.

Yet, for some reason, life always gets in the way, and by the end of May, we're lucky if we've even bothered to buy, borrow or beg the seeds we'll need for our crop. This year, we went ahead and planted our sunflower seeds in June (a bit late) and watched them first grow in pots on our sunny back porch. By the end of June, we planted them at the edge of our tomato garden, just to see if they'd make it.

Today, the first week in September, we have the tallest sunflower we've ever had - by far. In the photo, my son and two daughters are standing next to it. My son is 6'0" and he's standing on the deck, about 6 inches above the garden. This sunflower is actually peeking over our roof.

We are awed and amazed that this plant grew to be so tall in such a short time. I suppose I can say that my gardening plans worked out after all!

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

The Goal of Reading

2006-09-05T10:42:00.000-05:00

“Education ... has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading.” - G. M. Trevelyan

When my son, Andy, was still learning to read (at age 8) I was told by several people that I should let him read anything he chose – because the goal was that he read. I questioned this, as there were many 1st and 2nd grade level horror books and other books with frightening or inappropriate content. The common response to that seemed to be, “Well, at LEAST he’ll be reading.”

I have to admit, I was torn. The system dictates that a child should be reading by the end of the first grade. My son finished only ½ of public school first grade because we had two Navy moves during that year. Consequently, we put him in first grade again when we were finally settled for a three year tour. At the end of that second year of first grade, he was still greatly struggling to read.

When 2nd grade began, there were a variety of circumstances in the classroom that made it nearly impossible to learn; the teacher was out on a seemingly endless maternity leave, and the substitute teacher was letting children crawl out the windows… literally. When the city teachers went on strike halfway through the school year, I took my son out of school not because I thought I could teach him, but for his own protection. Plus, I knew he wasn’t learning anything at school. How worse could it be at home?

To make a very long story short, after taking him out of school, my son could read within the month. Perhaps he just finally “got it” or perhaps it was because he finally escaped the chaos. I’ll never know. I do know, however, that I refused to accept the mantra that “at LEAST he’ll be reading.” Good, sound literature is out there, available to us all. Sometimes we have to wade through the muck to find it, but it’s there.

And not only does good literature teach proper grammar and big ideas, it also shows children early how they can distinguish between that which is worth reading, and that which isn't.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Charm School

2006-08-30T22:30:00.000-05:00

When I was 13-years-old, my mother enrolled me in a local modeling class, much to my chagrin. My mother grew up as a southern belle, but I was being raised in the Colorado Rockies in the 1970s and 80s where the fashion choice consisted mainly of Levi’s, a down vest, and hiking boots. On my first day at Jeanine’s School of Charm, I trudged into the studio in a dress and high heels; the required dress for the class.

Although I kicked and screamed about going to the class, I was pleasantly surprised. I quickly discovered that not one of the other 8 girls in the class wanted to be there any more than I did. Together in our misery, we learned how to walk prettily, how to put on make-up, how to sit like a lady, and how to keep good posture. We also learned about our colors, we had our hair done at a local salon, and we even had a photo shoot with a professional photographer. Miserable as we all pretended to be, we had a wonderful time.

Today, in our homeschool, I began a charm class with my two daughters, ages 12 and 13. It was quite different from my charm school from all those years ago. We began by sitting on our sunny back porch, simply going over the book and talking about what it would entail. Unlike my experience as a teen, this charm course is not only about looking pretty and being graceful, it is also about having a kind and gentle spirit, and letting others see Jesus in us.

We took photos to go on the “before” and “after” page, we talked about posture, how to sit, and how to stand, and we discussed what we would be doing over the next several months. Interestingly, I found that my daughters did not have the preconceived notions that I’d once had about charm class, nor did they have any concern about what their peers might think. They are actually looking forward to the course.

I have to admit, I am going to teach my girls that one can look modest, graceful and pretty in blue jeans and hiking boots; it all just depends on how it’s put together. Oddly enough though, I think they’ll go for the dresses and high heels. Go figure.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

The Scent of Bread Baking

2006-08-29T21:15:00.000-05:00

A few years ago, my husband and I read a marriage book together; well, let me be honest – I read the marriage book and told him all about it. Either way, one thing the book suggested that we both took to heart was that we should each make a list of 20 things we like about each other. We were both surprised at some of the things on the lists!

One thing on my husband’s list about me that came as a complete surprise was that he loves coming home in the evening to the smell of bread baking. Understand that I have never claimed to be a cook. My cooking is more for survival than for enjoyment, though in recent years I’ve been trying to change that. Plus, the only bread baking I’ve ever done (that’s worked anyway) is in a bread machine.

At first, I got very nervous and thought I needed to finally learn how to make bread the old-fashioned way, but he assured me that he loves the smell whether it’s in the bread maker or the conventional oven. The idea is the SCENT, not so much the bread – in fact, he’s not the biggest bread fan – he just likes the way the house smells. Something about it seeming homey and cozy.

So I made bread this morning and I learned something new. My children like to smell the bread baking, too. It made the house cozy and warm on a rainy day, and somehow, it helped us to hit the books with a bit more enthusiasm. Hey, we need all the help we can get! :)

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

One down, 174 more to go…

2006-08-28T20:09:00.000-05:00

Well, as planned, we had our first day of school today. Our two daughters, now in 7th and 8th grade, had a very successful day. We began at 8:00 sharp and found that we had allotted way more time than we actually needed for their list of assigned subjects. Other than their hour of reading, they finished everything by 12:30, just in time to attend a friend’s birthday party. They plan to finish their reading tonight in bed.

Our son, who began his college classes at the community college where he spent his senior year in high school, started off his year with a bang, attending a class on Abnormal Psychology. He came home this evening with many bizarre conversation topics and we had a lot of laughs.

I so wish that every day of the school year would be as successful as the first day often seems to be. Yet I know that in a few weeks, the newness will wear off and we’ll get into a rut. By Thanksgiving, we’ll be craving a break from the books. Perhaps this year will be different. Perhaps we’ll stay excited and each day will seem fresh. I know that my attitude is usually the barometer of the home, so it is primarily up to me to remain excited – or at least to seem so to my children.

That is my prayer on this successful, first day of school; that every day would be as fresh, exciting, and new to me as the first.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

On the Brink

2006-08-27T20:59:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow is our first day of school. I’ve been gathering the curriculum since early April. I’ve been sketching out the plan for the year since May. I placed all the orders, collected what I need, and I’ve gone over and over how it will all play out.

It’s been quite a hot summer where we live, here in Maine, but the past week has been the cherry on top of the ice cream sundae; each day we were delighted with sunny days in the 70s and there was not a black fly or mosquito to be found anywhere. We spent the days going to the beach, working in the garden, and coming in each day with tanned faces and glowing smiles.

I planned yesterday, Saturday, to gather all the school books together and give it one last once-over, just to make sure I have everything I need; yet it was another perfect day and the sun was beckoning. With a long, cold winter in the very near future, I couldn’t justify staying inside for any reason.

Today, thankfully, it has been raining off and on all day with temps in the upper 50s. This was just the push I needed to get into school mode. I put on the classical music, whipped up a batch of brownies, and I think I’ll bake a lasagna tomorrow. Tonight everyone has gone on to bed early, and I’m now heading there, myself. We have an early morning awaiting us and I can’t wait!

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Last Minute Online Orders

2006-08-21T20:52:00.000-05:00

When we first started homeschooling ten years ago, I ordered all our curriculum either over the phone, by mail-order, or at the annual curriculum fair held in the nearest big city. My, how things have changed.

Now, how I LOVE ebay, Amazon, CBD and so many of the other online sites where I can order those last minute books before school starts next week - - books that I thought I had (or that I thought the local library had.)

Last night I decided to do a home-stretch check on all my curriculum for the coming year. I went over the books, the schedule, etc. I checked on my daughters' literature curriculum to see if I had on hand the first couple of books they would be reading. When I discovered that I don't own either of the books they will read first, I checked online at our local library to see if they have the books in stock. I need a specific version of Don Quixote, and a copy of The Man Without a Country. What a helpful thing it was to be able to do a library search online - just a few years ago, there was no such option.

When I discovered that the local library doesn't have the exact version of Don Quixote that I need (nor does have any version of The Man Without a Country - surprising if you ask me), I checked the other neighboring library, but still no luck.

So late last night, I went to ebay and found one of the books at a very good price, and the other one was at Amazon - used, but in good condition. Both should be here by the time the first day of school arrives on the 28th.

All this in just a couple of hours and without even leaving my home. Puts a whole new spin on the concept of HOMEschooling, doesn't it? :)

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Another Graduation

2006-08-12T20:34:00.000-05:00

This evening our family attended the graduation party for a fellow homeschooling student. The young lady has been a friend of our son – and of our family – for about eight years now. We have watched her grow from a quiet, shy little girl to a poised, warm-hearted, Godly young woman.

The party was held on one of the many peninsulas on the coast of Maine and the day was picture perfect. A friend of the family offered up her log home that sits right on the water. All afternoon kids, teens, and adults frolicked on the private dock, kayaked up and down the secluded inlet, and thoroughly enjoyed a spectacular autumn-like day.

The food was delicious, the scenery unbelievable, and the company was… well, it was simply family. Not all were homeschooling families, not all went to the same church, and most were unrelated by blood. Yet, these are people we have laughed with and cried with. We have rejoiced in one another’s successes and mourned one another’s pain. We may have experienced frustrations with each other at times, but all the pleasant memories far outweigh any negative ones.

We casually sat on the wide, log deck overlooking the sparkling water, listening to the laughter of the children, and sharing stories and memories, and I had very mixed emotions. As the sun set over the pines across the inlet and the sky grew darker, a chapter in this young lady’s life came to a similar end. There was beauty, peace, warmth, and a stretch of unknown looming in the distance.

Thankfully, we (and she) know that although the unknown darkness ahead may seem frightening, there is One who can see in the darkness, One who sees the other side, and One who has already made provisions for us before we even know where we are going.

Yes, tonight was a good night. I congratulate our young friend, and all the other graduates, homeschooling or not, who are experiencing one sunset, only to find a brand new sunrise on the other side.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Reversed Prejudices

2006-08-08T23:10:00.000-05:00

I have a confession to make. I have certain prejudices about institutionalized situations. Let me explain.

I haven't experienced the traditional school setting since my son (now graduated from high school) was in the second grade. My two middle-school aged daughters have never been to a traditional school (or as some nay-sayers would put it, they've never been to school!)

Consequently, when my children go to camp, participate in sports, or do any other large group activity, I am often put off by the necessary parameters and implementations that are part of corraling and leading a large group of children.

For instance, when I picked up my girls from camp last week, all the children had to put a hand in the air to show that they were quiet and that they were listening. This week, when I picked up my youngest daughter from basketball camp, the girls were directed to do various hand-clapping sequences to show either that they were paying attention, or to indicate some other sign of group participation.

I understand the need for such things, as a group of 50 children must be controlled, and individualized attention is an unrealistic expectation. It would be utterly impractical to speak to a large, wiggling crowd of children with a voice that one would use to speak to one or two children at a time. It would be utterly useless to expect 100 kids to sit quietly when each has a basketball in her hands.

But after having such a rapport with my children, and having encouraged mutual respect in our household, I bristle when my daughter must sit in the "pack" and hold her hand up to show she is quiet or clap out a series of beats to show she's listening, when she was already, clearly, listening.

Of course, this prejudice, like all prejudices is MY problem. While many homeschoolers suffer from the prejudices of the nay-sayers, we homeschoolers often find ourselves judging others - even when the judgments are trivial or unfair.

Thankfully, I've learned enough NOT to open my mouth and share my prejudices with my children. They love our quiet, calm, un-packlike homeschool, just as they love the organized chaos of team sports and camps. I tell myself that this will make them well-rounded and interesting adults one day. That remains to be seen, but maybe, hopefully, they will have fewer prejudices than their mom.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Prioritizing the Subjects

2006-08-03T06:05:00.000-05:00

This week my girls are away at camp, so it is a good time for me to do some school planning and organization. I actually bought most of our curriculum and typed out a rough draft of our coming year back in April, but this is the time to do fine tuning and make sure I have everything we'll need.

As I look through all the fresh new books (and several used ones bought on ebay) I have to be honest with myself and know that some of the subjects will not receive the attention they deserve. In spite of all my planning and good intentions, there are subjects that we sacrifice on the altar of illness, fun, travel, activities, and other unexpected interruptions. It took me many years of homeschooling before I actually came to terms with this fact, because it IS a fact.

So as I sift through the subjects for the upcoming school year, I know that there are core subjects to which we will give our utmost attention: Bible, math, literature, and writing. Coming in at a close second are science and history. Then there are the third class subjects such as Latin and logic. These are important, but not as important as the aforementioned subjects. Lastly, our fourth class subjects are art, music and charm class. While all these subjects are equally important to me (with some of the lesser ones being much more fun and interesting, in my opinion), I know that even the best laid homeschooling plans can be derailed by one illness, one visit from family, one surprise getaway for mom and dad, or whatever.

My encouragement to new homeschool moms is to prioritize your subjects, acknowledging that some will suffer while others cannot be missed. We want our children to experience everything and learn it all, but even the public schools don't teach everything. So much of the teaching at home is spontaneous, emotional, and revolves around life skills and human interaction. Plus, my children manage to find time to do art and music in spite of my placing them low on the priority list, because those are the subjects they enjoy the most; in fact, that may be why I can put them at the bottom at all.

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Graduation

2006-08-02T15:28:00.000-05:00

This past year has been a new adventure for us as a homeschooling family. Our son (our oldest child) spent his senior year taking classes full time at the local community college. He was accepted to a private university in Pennsylvania on a partial scholarship, and after planning to go there for the past 6 months, he has now decided that he would rather stay here in our area and take one more year at the community college before transfering to a local state school. He claims it is for financial reasons, but we are all very much aware that he has a girlfriend who will be here this year, finishing her senior year. Either way, at least he is going to college and is still working hard.

This past weekend we celebrated his high school graduation with a party at our home. We invited extended family, family friends, and all his close friends locally. It was a special time of laughter, fun, and memories. We all enjoyed flipping through a scrapbook depicting his growth and words of wisdom from family and friends.

When he was a baby, I held my son tight and imagined the day he would grow up and leave home and not need me anymore. Today, I don't know if that day will ever come. I mean, I know he will grow up and leave home, but he still phones me at least once a day during work, and he always asks my advice, even if my response only proves to him that at the age of 19, he knows everything and his old mom knows so very little. I remember knowing everything when I was 19, too, so I try to be patient and remember that even though his body looks like a man, his brain is still maturing, and will be for a few years yet.

Each day having a gregarious, communicative, witty, assertive 19-year-old son is a roller coaster ride. I'm holding my breath as I watch him make decisions, some of which may affect the rest of his life. He is so wise for his age, yet still has so much to learn. He is so full of life, yet has experienced only the tip of the iceberg that we call life. He has so much to say and so many opinions, yet he still has a lot to learn about humility, gentleness, and self-restraint. I pray that everything we taught him these past 19 years will stick - somewhere in that stubborn, handsome head. I hold on tightly to God's assertion that if we train up a child in the way he should go, when he is old, he will not depart from it. What age constitutes "old," anyway?

Either way, in this adventure we call homeschooling, we've got one down and two to go!

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

We do what we can...

2006-04-04T12:56:00.000-05:00

Well, I realize it's been six long months since I last posted here. Part of me would like to say i'ts because my children and I have been hard at work all winter: them, doing all the academics they should be doing, reading a book a week, and getting years ahead of all their peers, and me, keeping the house spotless, cheerfully helping them with their studies and having a piping hot dinner ready for the family each night at 6 p.m.

But the reality is, we live in reality! By the end of the winter, our house is chock full of all the junk I got rid of in the fall. Where did it come from? Isn't this the pair of boots I threw out because someone grew out of them? Did they walk back in here by themselves? And the dog and cat hair; those four-legged creatures that my children love more than they love each other - oh the hair and debris brought in by those animals! A hot dinner at night often means a few Hot Pockets thrown into the microwave and then eaten in the car on the way to basketball practice, violin lessons, or Wednesday night church. Academics might mean listening to a book on tape whenever we are in the car (which is a lot) in 10 minutes spurts.

Still, as we take a bit of Spring Break and look back on the school year that's almost over, I cherish the times we've had together.

My son is a senior, and while he's taken most of his classes at the community college this year, we've spent a lot of time together filling out college applications, figuring out the mystery of financial aid, and breathlessly waiting and hoping for acceptance - the queen mother of vindication for ME to all the homeschooling nay-sayers!

Our two daughters are now of middle school age and we've passed the years where they want to get outside every day and go sledding or build a snowman. They, like their mom, have learned to hibernate and wait out the long winter. We did go ice skating regularly, though, and have a lot of fun memories there.

Last week we began the spring clean up of our yard. With an unusually warm four day stretch, we bagged leaves, bound up sticks, and made a bunch of trips to the town dump. I'd like to say we'll have the whole yard looking like a Japanese flower garden before the heat and humidity of summer gets here. But again, I must remember where I live - - - in reality. In reality, especially for homeschoolers, we just do what we can!

Copyright © 2006 - Paulla Estes

Art?

2005-10-01T06:11:00.000-05:00

Somehow when fall rolls around, I get a burning desire to do all the things I should have done over the summer. I suddenly want to do the Spring Cleaning that never happened last Spring. I find I want to purge the house of old clothing, old books, old anything that we no longer need. And I always find a room in our house that needs to be painted. It's not as if I have anything else to do in the fall, what with school having started, soccer practices, violin lessons, horseback riding lessons, etc.

Whether or not it makes sense, fall is my busy time. Much like the chipmunks and squirrels running breathlessly around our yard, frantically searching for acorns, I start working - hard.

I have company coming to visit next week, and although we have extra school work to do in preparation for the school we'll miss, I decided this would be the perfect time to paint my oldest daughter's room. And understand that in our house, when we paint a room, we must paint the trim and doors as well. When we moved into our home many years ago, all the doors and trim were a dark brown, which isn't my favorite. Over the years I've been systematically painting it all a creamy white. We're about 5 rooms down with 3 to go (including bathrooms).

So I announed to my kids that we'd start on Monday and finish on Friday. We'd do the trim and doors first and then choose a color for the walls. Ah - ignorance. Yes, in spite of all my years painting, I forget about the preparation time. We couldn't just go in and start slapping paint up on the walls. First we had to clean out and empty (for the most part) my daughter's room. Then we had to clean the walls and trim and tape off the ceiling and carpet. We finally began painting on Wednesday afternoon. I kept up some semblance of school through Wednesday, but by the time Thursday rolled around, we were so behind on my painting schedule, I told the kids school was cancelled and that we were going to paint all day.

There was much rejoicing in our home that morning, and my 11-year-old said, "Cool, we're going to do art all day!"

It is now Saturday morning. The trim and doors are finished and today we will begin painting the walls blue. We hope to move all the furniture back in late this afternoon or tomorrow after church.

On Friday afternoon, my older daughter came to me with our curriculum book and worriedly said, "Mom, we are SO behind in school." (She is my perfectionist child and for her, missing one subject one day is being SO behind in school.) I assured her that we'd catch up, but she reminded me that we have company coming next week - for 10 days. Hmmm. Maybe on Monday we'll do a week's worth of school?

Nah.

While we painted, my children and I listened to music, sang, talked about life, talked about our goals and dreams, laughed and goofed around, and often just enjoyed the silence with no other sound than our brushes on the wood. They learned about family, about hard work, and about finishing the job even when "art" got to be quite boring and tedious. They learned about cleaning, purging, preparation, and making the home more beautiful. In the evenings, they read their books and we talked about them while we painted the next day.

I love that we can do such a variety of "schooling" in our homeschooling. I look around our living room that is now crammed full of my daughter's furniture and belongings. I walk down the hall and see the evidence of the room in progress. I think of my sleeping children in their beds around the house. And as always, I'm so thankful I can take part in the privilege of homeschooling. As my fellow homeschoolers know, it is so much more than academics. So much more.

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

First Day of School

2005-09-02T11:05:00.000-05:00

Well, some of my more diligent homeschooling friends began school earlier this week, last week, or even a couple of weeks ago. I tried that a few years ago, but for the past two years, we've started after Labor Day. This year I decided to start the friday before Labor Day weekend, just to sort of get everyone back in school mode, but today has been a doozy.

Everyone got up on time and my son headed out the door (a bit late) to his college classes. The girls and I started exactly when I'd planned, but just minutes after they began reading silently, the phone rang. My mom needed to talk about some important issues, so I took the call. It went a bit longer than I'd hoped, but she was having a bad day and I was glad to talk to her. My youngest daughter, however, was a bit perturbed at me for being on the phone on the first day of school - a big no-no during school hours at our house. We had a few words about her attitude and some pre-teen tears were shed, but we moved on.

About an hour later, as we were finishing language arts and getting ready to move into science, the neighbor across the street called. Our daughters are to babysit their cats this weekend while they are out of town, and they needed them to come now, if possible, to go over arrangements, get the key, and help them find one of the cats. The neighbor apologized about interrupting school, but it is a beautiful sunny day and my girls were happy to go spend a bit of time with the neighbor's cats, so off they went.

They returned about 45 minutes later, having helped the neighbor rescue one of the cats out of a tree, and then they started on math. Within 30 minutes, there was a knock on the door from yet another neighbor, saying they'd decided to go away for the weekend and could we look in on their cats, as well? Off the girls skipped again, down the street to see where the food was kept, etc.

Now I hear their cheerful feet coming back into the house. It is already after noon and only about half the school work is finished for the day. It is also 80 degrees, dry, and perfect outside. Do I dare force them to work the afternoon away, when in just a couple of months the winter snows will come?

I think that the last 9 years of homeschooling have taught me, if nothing else, that even the best laid plans are often railroaded by life. The neighbors needed us, my mom needed me, and now WE need the sunshine. I can't think of anything taught in a book that would supercede learning to help our neighbors and those we love. And I can't imagine staying inside on a day like today when the long winter looms on the horizon. Today I will say that I taught my children to stop and smell the roses - or enjoy the sunshine, as the case may be!

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

Hurricane Katrina

2005-08-30T20:21:00.000-05:00

This is a tragic day in the lives of our brothers and sisters on the Gulf coast. Hurricane Katrina did her worst and for thousands, life will never be the same. Please join me as we pray for the victims and families of those affected by Katrina. If there are any specific names you would like us to pray for, please let me know.

Back to School

2005-08-30T08:04:00.000-05:00

Those three words incite different feelings in us all. For many of us, the words "Back to School" bring back memories of new school clothes, fresh school supplies zipped up in our notebook zipper pouch, a solid desk in a classroom of 20 others, and a smiling teacher standing in front of the room, promising a glorious year. For others, the idea of going back to school brings back memories of being bullied on the school bus, ostracized in the lunch room, and sitting alone on the playground. For still others, a new school year might have meant one more year of feeling frustrated with academics, watching others succeed while we sat in the group that needed extra help, and always bringing home lousy report cards.

By the time I was in the 3rd or 4th grade, my number one excitement for going back to school was to find a place to belong. I knew I belonged at school - as did all the children back in the 70s, before homeschooling was legal or even a reality. But I didn't just want to be where I belonged, I wanted to BELONG. I wanted to be part of a group - preferrably the "cool" group. I wanted to belong to the kids who were chosen first on the teams in gym class. I wanted to be part of the group that always looked good and was smiled on by the teachers. I wanted to be part of the lunch room crowd that was rowdy, laughing and having fun. I had good friends at school, but it was never enough. The pack mentality in the public school constantly had me wishing for more - for cooler friends, for more friends, for better friends. In my heart I knew I was willing to do anything to be part of that cool crowd. Years later that willingness in my heart became a reality and I made many mistakes.

Today I look at my children here in my home, getting ready to start our new homeschool year. They have similar concerns about friendships and such, but it is on such a different scale than what many of us experienced in our childhood. My children know where they belong and they don't worry about it. There is no daily striving to impress anyone or run with the pack because the only pack is here in our house, where everyone is a solid member and the leader never changes. Sure, they have that when they go to soccer practice, birthday parties and even church, but it isn't a pressing, constant part of their daily lives; it is infrequent. The pack mentality will always be there for all of us, but God willing, my children won't have to run with the pack until they are old enough to understand that the pack isn't everything.

Fresh Fall Curriculum

2005-07-23T12:11:00.000-05:00

Our new curriculum arrived! There is nothing like the smell of brand new, un-opened books to get me in the mood for the up-coming school year. Each May I feel tired and so ready for summer vacation, but usually by the end of July I'm starting to look toward the up-coming year with anticipation and excitement.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not ready for school to start again just yet... we're having WAY too much fun doing a whole lot of nothing. But come September, I'll be ready. Until then, I'll just keep looking at the books and smelling them. :)

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

First Summer Hurrah

2005-06-22T15:19:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the first day of summer and the first really warm day we've had so far this season. To celebrate (we have little trouble regularly finding reasons to celebrate!) we decided to spend the day at the local swimming pond, complete with lifeguards and a water slide. We'd already finished school about a month before, but this was our first summer hurrah.

The day was perfect - a clear blue sky, warm dry weather, and abundant sunshine. Surprisingly there weren't many people at the pond; only a few young moms with preschoolers and toddlers, and two or three teenagers. My children enjoyed having the water slide almost all to themselves and I relished relaxing on my beach lawn chair in the sun.

The day passed cheerfully and rather uneventfully until about 3:30 p.m. when families with children began arriving in droves. I realized then that the public schools were still in session - on June 21! A parent that sat near us told me that it was actually the last day of school and that they'd gone extra long this year due to numerous snow days during the winter.

We had a wonderful day at the pond, but it really made me stop and think. First of all, I counted my blessings. I felt sad about the children who were still in school on the first day of summer when my children and others like them had finished a month before. I wondered why the public schools couldn't eat into Winter or Spring Break rather than the much needed summer vacation. And then I realized that it's much easier for a family of 5 to be flexible than for an entire school system to change its plan. I'm thankful we homeschool and have that flexibility - I only wish everyone could.

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

When they teach each other...

2005-06-19T15:36:00.000-05:00

When our middle child, Samantha, was four, she was eager to learn to read like her older brother, so I acquired an easy phonics workbook and worked with her casually. I knew she was bright and very verbal, but I was in no hurry for her to learn to read - especially at four. But she surprised me that year; she scurried through the workbook at a breakneck pace and by the end of the school year, she was reading first grade books. I wanted to congratulate myself for teaching her at such a young age, but I'd have to admit she taught herself. I just kept steering her toward the books and she managed to read them.

Samantha's little sister, Molly, was one year younger. Samantha used to read to Molly, sometimes on pillows in the empty bathtub, or in other interesting locations. When the next school year began, Molly was four. She was not nearly as verbal as her sister; in fact, she was so quiet that I really wasn't sure what she could do or learn. I mistakenly figured she'd just hang out with the rest of us while we did school and maybe pick up something along the way.

While I did 5th grade work with their older brother, five-year-old Samantha decided to take it upon herself to teach Molly to read. She found the old phonics workbook and began going through it with her. Halfway through the school year, Molly was farther along than Sam had been the year before. I couldn't believe it. Makes me wonder if I should just let them teach each other everything while I sit in the sunshine with a cool drink and a magazine... but somehow I think that wouldn't last long!

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

What I Learned in the Springtime

2005-06-09T15:48:00.000-05:00

When my children were a bit smaller - the youngest was five and the oldest was eleven - we used to celebrate spring by biking through the woods near our house to a nearby pond. We went armed with buckets and bags so we could bring back a few of the newly hatched tadpoles.

We learned a lot during those springtime adventures. We learned about the different types of tadpoles - frogs and toads - and we learned about how to take care of them at home. We learned about what to do with them once the tail goes away and the legs appear. We learned that the tiny toads will be carried away by neighborhood birds once they're mature enough to crawl up out of the water onto a rock.

So much of homeschooling is what happens when the books have been shut for the day, and the children aren't the only ones who learn. I learned a lot during those early years, as I'm still learning now. I learned that even the tiniest child has compassion for living things and I learned that losing a tiny toad to a bird can make a mom cry.

Looking back, I've learned that those times are precious and should be savored. The children grow up so quickly.

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

The Courage to Start

2005-05-29T20:11:00.000-05:00

When we started homeschooling, I can't honestly say that courage was involved. Frustration, perhaps, with the local school system in our home city at the time. Stubbornness, as I ignored all the nay-sayers and yanked my son out of school right in the middle of a city-wide teacher strike. Ignorance, as I plowed full steam ahead, not really realizing what I had chosen. And love, the most important ingredient of all. I loved my young son and toddler daughters, and I wanted something better for them.

By the time I began looking at curriculums and searching out a homeschool support group, I had been home schooling my 2nd grade son for a month on library books and a math workbook I found at a local office supply store. By the time I began learning about the varying philosophies and styles of homeschooling, we were many months into it. By the time I realized this was the best thing for our family, I had been saying year-to-year, that this year may be our last.

Now, many years later, I haven't missed a thing. I've seen all my children through learning to read, learning to pray, learning to memorize. Together, we've moved across country, met new friends, started new money-making projects and redecorated the house. We've traveled together, visited museums, talked about our fears and dreams, cried together over lost pets and personal crises.

I can say I've been there to see my children at their best, at their worst, and during the times of monotony. There have been times when I wanted to resign as "Mom" and even change my name, but they wouldn't accept my resignation and continued to call me "Mom" even when I ignored them. There have been times when I have doubted our choice to homeschool and have agonized over what I think they may be missing.

But even more, there have been times I hugged them and cried because they were getting so big and smart and funny. There have been times when I wish I could make the clock stand still - for a moment, for a day, for a year. My oldest is nearly 18 and the young ones are not far behind. As the years pass, I am so thankful I've not missed a moment. I'm so thankful I had the courage - or ignorance - to start.

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

Don't be Enslaved to the Curriculum

2005-05-21T10:18:00.000-05:00

This is one of the best pieces of advice given to me by a veteran homeschool mom when I was just starting out. She told me that the curriculum is there for my use at my discretion.

Over the years as homeschool curriculums have come and gone in our lives, I've often gone back to what she told me. There have been times that I've found myself enslaved to the curriculum, forcing myself and my children to continue with books or materials that simply aren't working for us. That's when the words ultimately ring in my head, "Let it go and find something new."

After nine years of homeschooling, I'd have thought I'd be an expert by now, knowing exactly what works for my children; but my children are all different and they change from year to year, as do I. This upcoming school year, for the 3rd and probably not the final time, we are starting over with a completely different curriculum. The old one had made us weary and grouchy. Now we're all excited. Maybe we just needed the change.

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes

Getting Started

2005-05-13T05:53:00.000-05:00

They say homeschooling is not for everyone. They say only the hearty few have the fortitude to teach their children at home. To that, I say this: who taught your child to smile? Who taught him to speak? Who taught her manners at the table? Who taught him to pick up his toys after play? Who taught her to say her prayers? Who taught him to be kind and share with his friends? Who taught them to love?

After all these, the three R's aren't quite so daunting.

Copyright © 2005 - Paulla Estes